Frayed Edges
by AlphaMiddle21
Summary: After Mon-EL "leaves" after the Daximite invasion Kara just feels broken. She throws herself into her work and ends up getting hurt in the process. Her friends are there to help. eventual supercorp... maybe. I haven't decided. Originally posted on Ao3. Not to worry it was my work then and now. Nothing sketchy going on.
1. Chapter 1

**AN -**

 **Hi Friends! Here's a little bit on the gap between season 2 and 3. I hope you enjoy. I plan updating once a week.**

 **Please review/comment! It really makes all the work worth it!**

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It's about 10 pm on a Tuesday night in National City. People around the city are crawling into bed to rest for another day. Another day they get to have because Supergirl and her team. Said team had gone home for the night, their duties wrapped up for the day. J'ohn said he had the night shift and that they should get some much deserved rest. However, that did not mean that Alex had listened. The boss had sent everyone home at 4, taking a page out of General Statler's book when he ran a department at the pentagon. Alex knew if she got caught here he'd be mad but she had work to do. She basically had been running the DEO alongside J'ohn for months now. She was the go-between for Lucy in D.C. and the jolly green giant and there was so. Much. to. Do.

Maggie: I'll meet you at the DEO just finishing up

Alex: Almost done here. See you soon.

The hum of lights dimmed in the empty building fade to nothing as Alex stands from her seat and cranes her neck releasing a string of popps. She bends back over the paperwork in her office where she's spent the last few hours signing things and looking over files and reports she had just finished. She moves the pile of finished work to a somewhat neat stack on the corner of her desk and plops back in her chair. Another night of _crossing every "I" if you will_ , Alex chuckles at the memory of a tired Maggie claiming to be doing that when she was late for a date. She runs her fingers along the smooth edge of the last manila folder flipping it open with a sigh just as she feels Maggie step in behind her to rub her shoulders and kiss the top of her head. Alex places a hand on top of Maggie's as she tries to look up at her fiance. "You ready, Danvers?"

Alex turns to the newly opened file on her desk and lets out a long sigh. "Yeah." She says closing it. It can wait till tomorrow, she's exhausted and she wants nothing more then to go home and curl up with Maggie. It's been a long day and after her argument with Kara the other night she just felt drained. Alex stands up to grab her jacket from the back of her chair sliding it on as she slips her arm around Maggie's shoulders, returning the kiss to the top of her head. "Let's go home."

They walk wrapped in each other as Alex closes down the empty DEO for the night. Kara had been working so much that they really had not been busy. It was nice but Alex worried for her sister. In the quiet DEO they hear a thud, a crash as they walked past the training room. A green glow coating the air just outside the window. The two stop and watch Kara pound her fists into a concrete punching bag. "Let her be Alex, she is in here alone when she knew the DEO was going to be empty for a reason." Alex notices the level of Kryptonite is up near 30%, twice as much as it should be. She also notices wet marks on the concrete from Kara's bloodied knuckles and she just about losses her shit.

She steps away from Maggie to take care of this completely asinine alien she has for a sister. She steps into the room and turns off the Kryptonite. The concrete breaks in half at the next contact of Kara's fist and flies across the room into the wall. "That is enough."

"Why are you here?" Kara whips around to face her. Hands firm on her hips after glancing at her already healing knuckles. Her hair still moving from the momentum of her spin. Blue eyes staring holes in her older sister. Alex swore that if she looked any harder she'd be a pile of ash from Kara's heat vision. "J'ohn sent everyone home at 4."

Despite being a little bit intimidated by the very _not_ -so-sunny version of her sister standing in front of her Alex remains in her grumpy-protective of this reckless idiot-big sister mode. She crosses her arms and stairs right back knowing her eyes don't even glow a little bit. "I should be asking you the same thing."

Kara turns away from her and wipes her knuckles off with a towel she had grabbed from one of the shelves. "Go away, Alex." The older sister takes a step forward into the gym leaving room for Maggie to watch the two sisters over Alex's shoulder. Kara slams the towel down into the soiled bin and steps toward the one pushing her buttons with fists clenching and flexing by her sides. "You know what, nevermind. I'm leaving now so don't worry about it." She brushes past Alex's shoulder though still careful not to touch her. Kara didn't trust herself right now to control her strength enough to not hurt the woman before her who was trying so hard to be strong.

"Kara." Is whispered with a tenderness Supergirl didn't wish to hear but she was already deep into the night sky before it had finished falling from her sister's lips. Not deep enough though to not listen to the conversation between her now heartbroken-at-her-expense sister and her fiance. "Maggie, I want my little sister back." Kara can practically hear the tears rolling down her cheeks. She can see the way her shoulders drop and her head dips forward when she's upset - crushed.

"I know, babe. I know. She'll get through this, just give her time." Kara knows too that Maggie has wrapped Alex in a hug and is now rubbing soothing circles over her sister's back. _Thank Rao_ for the detective who seems to be cleaning up Supergirl's messes at every turn.

"But…"

"Don't tell me you've never tried to feel better by punching something or overworking yourself." Alex has no words, she had done that, quite often actually… though not as often as she found herself comforted by the burn of alcohol down her throat. She really didn't know which one was worse in this moment. At the very least, she finally decided, Kara is making things happen instead of becoming a useless drunk. "She will be ok."

"I hope so. I just wish she knew she is allowed to be human."

Kara feels tears welling up in her eyes when Maggie answers. "Is she?" The softness behind the detective's voice confirms that no… no she is not. Kara doesn't stick around to hear the rest of their conversation. She rockets off into the other side of the city to start her patrols.

She used to love flying. She still does most of the time. It is a place she can clear her head. It doesn't feel as dangerous to think up above everyone then it did in her bed or in her apartment either. She felt closer to the stars, closer to home, closer to _him._

Rao how she missed him. She saw his smile in nearly every happy thing her eyes came across and that made her want to crumple to the ground and cry at the shear loss of never getting to see it again. She saw his shining eyes playful and kind. His shaggy dark hair always sitting just a little differently on top of his head inviting her hands to run through it. His 5 o'clock shadow…. She saw him everywhere and it _hurt._ She loves him so much - _loved_ \- that it consumes every nerve in her body and constricts her chest making it too hard to breathe the very air she had made poisonous to him. And all she had to say to him was that she was _so sorry._ Sorry for what she wasn't sure. Sending him away? Killing his mother? His people? Him? Sorry for saving the world? Sorry for ripping both their hearts out without hesitation?

That wasn't true...Kara had hesitated. She hesitated. When it came time to push the button, to save the world, she had hesitated. And then... then he gave her the smallest of nods and her thumb pressed down ever so slightly releasing National City's only hope at surviving. Funny how hope, the very thing she was supposed to stand for and basically personify, worked it way into her thoughts. Mon-El had given her hope too, a hope she had to send away and would never have again. Pushing that button crushed her, she knew it would, and so she hesitated because the idea of losing Mon-El hurt so badly it almost wasn't worth it. _That's not true either_ , it would always be worth it. She knew it _had_ to be worth it. It had too. And she wasn't sure if that made it better or worse.

Her planet. Her city. Her responsibility. She just wished she could say _her heart-her responsibility._ But that was-and always would be-collateral damage she had to live with. Somehow. Somehow she had to figure out a way to live with that.

If it hadn't been for his little nod of permission, of support, she really doesn't know how she would have done it. In that moment she had been so, so proud of him. He had grown so much. He made that sacrifice too, made it easier for her to make that sarcirife. It still hurt like hell though, and Kara did not care-not even a little-if it ever stopped or not. She just missed _him._

She had told Alex that she was above being human. That she was better than that. Truth is, Kara didn't know if she was strong enough to be human and do what she had to do. She wasn't strong enough to be Kara Danvers and "earth's champion." So she told herself she was at peace with walking away from those comforts of being human. Walking away from those _vulnerabilities._ Shame on her for having a human heart. She tried to embrace earth and trying to be human for so long she had walked away from that Kryptonian pragmatism - stoicism - righteousness. Her body was invulnerable and damnit she wished to Rao that her heart was too. Kara can't even begin to remember a time when her heart didn't ache with everything she had. She could though. Mon-El had eased that hurt. He had made her _so_ happy. Alex eased that hurt too in her own way but not anymore. She can't do that anymore, if she was to lose Alex that would be it. No. Kara could not deal with that. Not anymore. Not again.

Now that Mon-El was gone it felt like she had lost part of Krypton all over again too. He was a Daxamite sure but he understood. He knew her planet. Her customs. Her language. Her culture. Her God. They could joke about things no one knew about. They could reminisce about things others wished to see in dreams. They could comfort each other over a loss no one else really felt. He knew and understood Kara Zor-El better than anyone ever could.

Kara knew she cared too deeply to ever be above being human so in order to be what she needed to be she had to stop doing _that_. It simply hurt too much. And she was so, utterly, exhausted.

Kara didn't even know when the last time she had slept was. She thanked Rao that her alien DNA allowed for weeks on end without sleep. Or that no one could see circles below her eyes or notice how exhausted she was. Exhaustion was better than sleep though. That was for sure.

She had been going non-stop. Supergirl had the city pretty much under wraps. Most the mess was cleaned up. Crime was way down. Supergirl had never been better at her job. Kara Danvers was publishing so many articles it wasn't even funny. It was a constant cycle, her flipping between Kara and Supergirl. She was only at her apartment long enough to shower and change. She whipped between the DEO and CatCo like some sort of crazy tennis ball. If anyone was paying close enough attention she imagines they might be getting whiplash watching her go back and forth.

She often forgot to eat, not that she could anyway. Every time she did she wanted to throw up. She was heart sick and it made her queasy. The only thing that made her eat was knowing that without eating she couldn't sustain her current life tempo. So she ate when she had to but nothing else. She couldn't. She wasn't punishing herself or anything like that. She just felt so torn up she literally couldn't stomach it.

A gritty substance in her mouth pulls her back to reality. She had been flying away as high as she could, pushing herself to try to be faster. She had to be faster, stronger, better. The substance was metallic on her tongue. _Lead._ It had to be. What other metal would be floating in the air? She had flow through a patch of lead wind currents had gathered. This time her stomach lurched. She really was going to be sick. But she just pushed harder back down to the now very empty CatCo building. No one would be there past the bosses orders. Especially not at close to 4 am.

She changes quickly into the spare set of "Kara clothes" she keeps hidden in her desk. She's standing behind her chair motionless knowing emotion is bubbling over. She takes her glasses off slowly and plants her hands on her desk the stems of her glasses tangled in her fingers. She wipes her face with her hand and lets out as shaky breath.

Kara tilts her head back to keep those tears from spilling over her eyelids. Trying every trick in the book to make it past this onslaught of sorrow without allowing herself to break. Once the initial emotion passes she drops her head in exhaustion. Her chest pounding with her increasing heartbeat, unsure if her truly broken heart just might shatter with the force of it. She tries to breath slowly through the pain but her heart still could nearly beat Barry in a race. Maybe this was the Kryptonian curse, not kryptonite. Maybe since they couldn't feel physical pain, though she had her share of that too, her emotional pain was that much worse.

She told herself she was being dramatic but it truly did feel like she held the weight of the world, worlds, on her shoulders. Mon-El had told her that it made her beautiful, but anymore it was just so heavy it was crushing her. Each day she had gotten a little bit closer to giving up and letting it but somehow she got back up and kept going. It was like auto pilot. She had no idea how she was keeping going at this point but she was scared that if she stopped long enough to think about it she wouldn't be able to.

That's the thing though about her burden...she couldn't complain. She had accepted it willing. Volunteered even. Well the weight of this world was her choice anyway. Krypton's was an entirely different story and she found herself a little bit guilty for Daxum as well. She once read a quote about not asking for a lighter burden but for broader shoulders.

She was with Mon-El when they had seen the picture of atlas straining to hold earth with tears running down his cheeks. He had pulled her close into his side as they considered the grafiti before them and he kissed the side of her head, just above her temple, and whispered in her ear "You don't need broader shoulders Kara. You have Alex. Kal. Lena. The super friends." he had gotten a little laugh at that "You have me. And we're all standing under you, there to hold you up when you need us."

And now she felt so alone but she also didn't want anyone around to help her. No one else was strong enough, Mon-El had been but he was gone, and then there was Kal… She may have initially failed to protect him but she'd be damned to fail her parents by not protecting him from this. She had to bear this burden on her own. She had to be strong, they needed her to be strong. Sure, _El Myara,_ but she didn't know how to do that anymore. It hurt too much. Everyone was so happy that Rhea had been defeated. Kara wanted to be but it only felt like knives straight to her heart every time she tried.

"Kara? What are you doing here? It's 4 AM." Kara looks up and tries to discreetly slide her suit off the table and put her glasses over her eyes still welled with tears. Only now does she notice the round drops of moisture spotting her family's crest. She hadn't realized she was staring at it or that she was crying. "Why do you have that?"

"I… Um…. She left it at my apartment."

"You guys are talking again?"

 _Kara remembers a certain talk with Lena a couple of weeks ago as Supergirl on Lena's office balcony after she had returned some of L-Corp's property Lillian had taken. "Thanks again, Supergirl."_

" _Anytime." Kara had gone to leave but she was stopped by a soft hand on her forearm._

" _I'm worried about our mutual friend. She's struggling." Lena had nearly whispered as her deep green eyes seemed to stare straight into Kara-Supergirl's- soul. "Does she know?"_

" _That I was the one who pressed the button? Yeah. Yeah, she knows."_

" _Are you guys ok? She doesn't blame you. She wouldn't. It's no more your fault then it is mine for making it possible."_

" _No, Lena. She doesn't blame you. Not even a little bit. She does, however, blame me, and she has every right to. I ripped her heart out and sent it into space to die. I wish I didn't have to but there isn't a universe where I don't make that decision." She goes to leave again, her voice struggling to push down the sorrow building in her heart and trying to escape through her throat._

" _Just take care of yourself, Supergirl. She can't be mad at you forever." She gave the waiting woman a half smile she hoped did not look as broken as it felt before taking off into the sky. She took off quick enough so her mutter of "I'm not so sure" was lost to the wind._

"I wouldn't go that far. I know she had to do it. Mon-Mike was her friend too, and if my broken heart is the price for a safe world I'd say that choice is a no brainer. Doesn't mean it didn't hurt."

"She is hurting too, Kara. I've never seen her so sad, so upset."

"I can't… I can't do this anymore." Kara looks down and tries to not hyperventilate as her heart feels like it is breaking all over again in her chest. _How many times can it do that?_ She steels herself and looks back into Lena's eyes finding some semblance of strength from knowing that she was about to crush her best friend probably and she owed Lena to do it with some sort of dignity.

"What do you mean?"

"ITS ME!" Kara takes off her glasses and changes into the suit, tears still wet on the crest. "It's me. Please." Before she can finish begging the woman in front of her to stop - stop making her talk about how much she cant stand to be herself - Lena has wrapped her in a hug.

"Oh, Kara…" Lena's heartbreak evident in the way Kara's name breaks in the air between them. "I'm so...so sorry."

Kara grows rigid in her arms wanting nothing more but to sink into her friends embrace but she doesn't deserve that. She doesn't deserve this kindness. Not after everything... "I am sorry I never told you."

"I'm not worried about that. I understand. What I am worried about is the conversation I had with super-you the other day." Kara steps back but Lena's arms remain on her upper arms rubbing gently as if any sudden movements might scare Kara off. Kara looks away from her for a moment, blush coloring her neck and crinkle appearing between her eyebrows.

The hero before Lena takes a deep breath and brushes away the contact at her arms. The blush is pushed back down and she watches as Kara's eyes turn from churning pools of emotion to ice. "Lena, don't. Please. I never should have said anything."

"But you did."

Kara hears sirens in the distance and lets out a sigh of relief… or exasperation… she really wasn't sure. "I've gotta go."

"Kara…" But by the time her name is muttered She's gone, papers rustling in the now empty office.

Kara allows hot tears to run down her cheeks. She tells herself it's from the wind in her eyes as she wipes them from her face before thy can dry in salty evidence on her cheeks. As Kara lands she comes face to face with Maggie, who still looks exhausted from being called out of bed so early. It was nearly 5 now. "Hey, morning Little Danvers. Glad you're here."

The woman smiles at her, dimples and all. Kara just hopes there's no evidence of her tears from just moments ago. The whole concept of greetings in the morning was lost on Kara in her current state of never sleeping. Did it even count as morning anymore? It had literally been 6 weeks. "Yeah."

As Maggie watches her carefully Kara looks over her shoulder to scan the building. One guy, lots of guns and explosives, more drugs. Nothing she couldn't handle. "We have a mid level drug dealer pinned down…" She is cut off by Kara's swift movement into the building. Not two minutes later the "perp" is on the ground in front of the detective in her handcuffs.

"Here you go. Drugs and weapons are secure." Kara goes to take off again when she is stopped by Maggie tugging at her with a fist full of her cape.

"Davis, take care of this scumbag. I need to talk to Supergirl." She orders the young looking cop now staring up at Kara with awe. Maggie's hand is on the hero's arm now. "You, come over here." She tries to drag Kara away from the other officers but the blonde doesn't budge a centimeter. She pulls her arm from Maggie's grip and crosses her arms over her chest. "I'll call Alex."

"Fine." The kryptonian relents and follows her soon to be sister-in-law off away from prying ears. "What do you want?

Kara and Maggie both cross their arms as they stand close enough to whisper at each other without being overheard. "What were you thinking? You didn't know-"

"X-Ray vision." She shrugs and drops her arms relenting from the defensive position she had taken. Maggie cared about her, weather it was for Alex's sake or not she didn't know. The way the detective had asked her wasn't to scold her, or even to talk down to her. Just a question. Nothing more. Alex probably would have tried to shoot her. "I gotta go."

"Hold on." Maggie held up her hand so it was centimeters from Kara's chest warning her to stay put for a second.

The hero feels her hands drop to her side, why wouldn't people just let her do what she needed too and leave? She wasn't running from them she was just done with whatever conversation was happening and she had stuff to do. "What?"

"Just tell me next time, ok?" Kara was glad for Maggie. She wasn't there to scold her, to get her talking, to tell her that she'd changed in all the worst ways. She let Kara be and Supergirl was really appreciative of that. It was fair to want to stay in the loop of what was about to happen at her crime scene. That's all this was.

"Yeah, sorry." Kara gives a half smile to show how sincere she is for not giving her a heads up. Maggie nods a thank you as if to say _don't worry about it Kid._ "Bye Maggie. Kiss Alex for me."


	2. Chapter 2

**AN-**

 **Hey guys, here's chapter 2! Personally I'm a fan of this one. Well.. I like this story in general. Thanks for the comments and reviews I've enjoyed talking with some of you.**

 **Keep the reviews coming! Always looking for where you guys think things should go. :)**

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A couple of hours and a couple of clusters of bananas later Supergirl had just stopped some kids from getting run over again at a crosswalk. _These people really need to pay more attention when they're driving_.

She had changed back into her now wrinkled powder blue button up and some slacks when she received a facetime from Cat asking how she was doing. She wanted to tell her the truth, she wanted Cat to give her some advice on how to feel better, but she couldn't bring herself to do that. She plastered on a smile and answered that, "Yeah, I'm doing alright." She flashes a megawatt smile. "Things are busy but really good."

"Good, I'm glad. I've read your articles. You're turning into quite the reporter."

"Thank you, Ms. Grant. That means a lot."

"You look _happy_ Kara." The woman smiles on the other end. Cat's answer had nearly broken her down on the spot.

"Yeah," Kara tries not to give away how much that had hurt but she felt like all the air had just gotten sucked out of her lungs. Like a swift hit to the gut, and Kara knew exactly what that felt like. Was she really that good at pretending? Was she really that good at spreading out her troubles so no one even knew the full picture of the inner turmoil she was dealing with? Or did no one care enough to notice that she was dying right in front of them... "I am. I have to go Ms. Grant. It was nice talking to you."

"Have a good day, Kiera, make sure that Jimmy Olson doesn't ruin my empire." The Press Secretary winks at her before hanging up.

Kara considers a visit to Maggie because she needs _someone_. Not to talk. Talking solves no problems- for humans maybe, but not for her. There was no point in talking but Kara felt herself cracking. She was just exhausted.

She couldn't go to Alex. She didn't know how to even try to face Lena. She felt so alone and that wasn't helping. She felt like she was pulling apart from her already frayed edges and allowing that to go any further would be the point of no return. She couldn't break, too many people were relying on her. She didn't get to be broken. Admitting to herself that she wasn't strong enough to hold herself together right now was tough but that was no excuse for breaking.

Kara pulls out her phone and takes a deep breath as she unlocks it, internally debating all the while if she should really text her soon to be sister in-law. She holds the breath in her lungs in a moment of strength-or is it weakness? She really isn't sure-she types out the message and presses send before she can talk herself out (or think better) of it.

 **Little Danvers:** Hey, are you busy?

 **Maggie** : Nope, just in the office. What's up?

 **Little Danvers** : Can I come over?

 **Maggie** : Yeah, I'll open the window

Not a few seconds Maggie's office is filled with a quick breeze and the young hero standing by her door. She looks all kinds of defeated, exhausted, just down in general. The way she picks at her hands in front of her and shifts nervously from side to side not able to look Maggie in the eye tells the detective that the hero in front of her is fighting so hard to keep it together but it's not quite working. She understood. Maggie had felt that way before. Plenty of times. "Can I um… Can I just sit here a while?"

"Yeah, of course." Maggie had fully expected Kara to sit at the chair across from her desk or in the corner, not on the floor leaning her back into Maggie's chair for support. The blonde's shoulders slightly touching her leg. Kara was surprised too but she couldn't help it as she found herself nearly collapsing on the floor allowing herself just the smallest of human contact.

Maggie keeps working as they sit in silence, reaching her hand down to rub Kara's head in a soothing motion. Yeah, the detective was a little busy with the usual paperwork but Kara hadn't reached out to anyone since before the invasion. Kara's head dips back to rest against Maggie's thigh as she allows her eyes to close with a sigh. Maggie picks up on the exhaustion radiating from the blonde. "When's the last time you've slept?"

Kara only shrugs slightly "a few weeks or so." _A month and a half. Six weeks. 44 days. Pick one._ She wants to say. _Maggie I'm so...so...tired._ "It's ok though."

"Weeks? How are your powers?"

"Sluggish but there." Kara doesn't tell her how the are starting to fade in and out. She doesn't tell her about how she aches all over. Or about lingering bruises from her last fight with an oversized alien after they had parted ways this morning. Or how sometimes when she's flying she falls for a second before she catches herself. No. Why would she tell her that?

"Are you eating?"

"Yeah, enough." She shrugs again. Funny how she doesn't have to eat as much when she eats real food instead of the junk she used to consume. It was like switching from the cheapest stuff at the gas station to JP8. She could hardly taste food anymore anyway. "I'm not punishing myself."

"Never said you were." Maggie's fingers slide down to knead at the Blonde's neck and Kara finds herself relaxing. Maggie thumb presses into a knot that causes Kara to twitch in surprise. She doesn't get knots. Without a word Maggie releases the cape from Kara's shoulders and brushes her long blonde waves over the tense shoulder.

Kara feels Maggie's legs frame her back as she twists to sit sideways on the chair and both hands start to work on the young woman's shoulders. Kara allows herself a moment to revel in the warmth of the touch before leaning away. Maggie doesn't grip harder to keep her there, but she doesn't let go either. "Maggie you don't have to… You can work on stuff I just needed… well I don't know exactly... but I knew you wouldn't judge or say anything and I just-"

"I'm glad you came. Sometimes I need that too." Her hands continue to press into what should be rock solid muscle free from the irritation of overuse "injuries." But Maggie doesn't say anything about that either. She is truly honored, touched, that Kara trusted her enough to seek her out when she didn't feel like she had anywhere else. "And let me. I just finished. Just tell me if it's too much," _too much pressure, too much stimulus, too much comfort._ Kara only nods. "Just keep breathing ok? Slow in and out. It helps."

The blonde mutters "ok" as Maggie's fingers walk across the top of her shoulders before she's rubbing Kara's back. The two enjoy the silence for a while. Kara occasionally twitching when the pressure is a little much or Maggie hits a sore spot but she never says anything. They find a rhythm in that. Maggie getting a sore spot, Kara twitching, Maggie rubbing the spot with the flat of her hand for a moment as the Kryptonian relaxes again, then she continues on the tender not.

This quiet is somewhat comforting and any noise feels like it will tear her from this momentary reprieve her bones were aching for. All people do anymore is try to get her talking and she really can't stand it. Kara doesn't know how long they sit there, Maggie pressing into her back, occasionally checking on her as if she knew Kara wasn't used to the sensation of knots or soreness lingering for more than 20 minutes. Eventually Kara finds it a little easier to breathe and skinks into the comfort offered by her… _friend?_ "Thank you." Kara whispers hardly loud enough for Maggie to hear. She's not really sure if she was meant to or not.

"You're welcome, Little Danvers." is uttered just as softly with a tenderness she'd never heard from Maggie. The detective turns her legs again going back to work but still rubbing Kara's shoulder with one hand. A few minutes tick past and her hand moves back to gently running through the young woman's long blonde hair and messaging her scalp.

This young woman was so frayed, as if she was hanging on by that last thread for dear life. Maggie couldn't get the image of a steel cable unwinding, and each little string snapping one by one out of her head. That was Kara. And if this could grant her any relief Maggie would give it. Kara, whom she is quickly realising has weaseled into her heart in a way very few people had, needed _someone._ Maggie smiles to herself thankful that in finding Alex she got a little sister too. She just wished Kara wasn't in so much pain.

Kara feels her eyes flutter shut, she doesn't even have the energy to fight that anymore. Each little movement of Maggies fingers through her hair taking her closer and closer to sleep. She lets her head drop sideways to lean against the lower edge of the desk. By the time Maggie has finished with all the paperwork she had let pile up for the last week Kara is sound asleep.

The older woman chuckles to herself at the gentle breaths she can hear from the tired hero. As carefully as she can Maggie gets out of her chair and grabs Kara's cape from the floor, draping it over the back of the chair for a moment. She retrieves the cushion from the chair in the corner and sets it by her feet as she kneels down next to the sleeping blonde. Supporting Kara with one arm she pushes the chair away with her foot and slides the makeshift pillow below where her head would be. With all the care in the world she lowers Kara back to the ground wishing there was some sort of bed for her to use but also knowing that sleep was sleep and at this point it didn't really matter if that was on old scratchy coffee stained carpet or a in plush bed.

Maggie stepps back and grabs the cape looking at the curled up hero on her office floor for a second before draping the strange fabric over her. She's a little surprised at how well it covers Kara but then again not really. Kara really wasn't all that big, especially not when she had curled herself up into a ball and was now resembling a puppy curled up in front of a fireplace.

 **Alex** : have you seen Kara? She's not at CatCo or the DEO or answering her phone

 **Maggie** : What's going on?

 **Alex** : nothing, there was a little scuffle at the bar but we handled it. She's been all over that stuff recently and I got worried. Lena also said she had missed their lunch plans and was getting worried.

Maggie snapps a quick photo of her love's little sister sleeping nearly under Maggie's desk, curled up under her cape. She looks peaceful if not a little bit comical. Maggie hadn't seen that kind of look on the littlest Danver's face in months.

Maggie: I've got her

She feels her phone buzzing in her hand before she sees the option to accept or deny the call from her fiance. She steps out of her office closing the door gently but standing so she can keep an eye on Kara through the window in her door. "What's wrong? Is she alright? Why is she sleeping on your floor? Is she hurt? I'm coming over there."

"Alex." maggie starts softly as the woman she loves spits the questions at her rapid fire. "ALEX." She whisper yells not wanting to stir the Kryptonian with super hearing even a little bit. "Alex she's fine… well maybe not fine but she's ok. She's not hurt. She came by earlier and just wanted to sit and not talk. She fell asleep leaning against my chair while I did some paperwork."

"Were you doing the hair thing?"

Maggie smirks at that but feels her expression softening at the whispered question from Alex. Some nights that's the only way she got the older Danvers to sleep after a particularly rough day. "Yeah, babe," she lets a light laugh escape "yeah I was doing the hair thing. Turns out Little Danvers is a fan of my hands as well."

"Gross." A small laugh on the other end lets Maggie know she succeeded in making the probably very much worried older sister crack a smile. "Thank you, Maggie. For taking care of her."

"Alex, don't thank me for that. Of course I'm going to take care of her."

"Did she say anything? She isn't sleeping is she? I knew I should have…"

"Alex there isn't anything you can do that you haven't been. She's hurting, way more then she lets on, we all know that. I just think she needs time and all we can do for now is be there when she needs us." By the silence on the other line she knows Alex is contemplating her words about to come back with a rebuttal about how Kara is pushing everyone away but something else was nagging at the detectives attention. "Does Kara get sore?"

"What?"

"Like knots in her muscles from over using them-sensitive to the touch-type sore."

"No. I rub her back sometimes when she's upset but that's more for the sentiment than actual practicality. I could never get my hands to actually press into her muscles to know if she had knots or not. Why?"

"Her shoulders felt like gravel. She was all twitchy when I'd get a tender one and she said her powers were sluggish but I'm pretty sure that isn't the whole story. I think it's from her lack of sleep so hopefully this helps." Maggie glances in the window again to see the hero move a little bit, to tuck her cape up under her nose, before settling back into a deeper sleep. "I'm not telling you so you can baby her. Just keep an eye on it. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't come back to me if she thought I told you."

"You're right. I hate that you're right." Alex sighs heavily. "I'm glad she has you if she feels like she can't come to me." Alex's voice gets choked at the admission.

"Oh, Al," Maggie wipes her hand over her face keeping her voice at a whisper "I don't think it's like that. Haven't you ever had something that you couldn't share with her right away? Usually you come to me for that right? She had gone to Mon-El. It wasn't because she doesn't trust you, Al. She didn't want to talk or anything, or anyone trying to fix it. You're a fixer, babe. She just wanted to sit. She needed some company. I don't think she even intended on leaning against me or falling asleep. It just happened."

"I know. I just want to be able to do _something_. I feel like she's slipping away. She hardly smiles anymore. She's always been so touchy and she doesn't want hugs and she just shrugs any contact away. I miss her, Maggie, and I see her every day."

Davis pokes his hand around the corner waiving Maggie over and mouthing "We have to go." She nodded and tells him it'll be a second with a wave of her hand. "Now. Like right now."

"Hey, babe, I gotta go. We can talk about this later. She'll be ok. I love you, Alex."

"Be safe. Love you too."

Two hours later when Maggie and some DEO agents are pinned down for 20 minutes before they contain the situation with no sign of supergirl Maggie is a little concerned but lets it go. "She still asleep?" Alex asks her as they walk away from the parting group.

"I hope so. She needs it."

"Yeah. Will you go check on her?" Alex drops her head trying to hide the worry peeking through her usually stoic exterior while at work. She had come to a stop before issuing the plea. Her hands shaking as she raises them to brush her hair away from her face.

Maggie rubs her arms in comfort before pressing a quick kiss to the top of her head. "Of course. I'll keep you updated. Love you."

When Maggie gets back to her office the alien is still on the floor but when she opens the door Kara springs to her feet landing in some sort of a startled-half-asleep fighting stance. She bumps a little into Maggie's desk and barely catches the detective's computer before it crashes to the floor. She straightens the desk up a little bit before turning to Maggie with red cheeks. "Sorry. Uh…"

"It's ok." The detective laughs and shakes her head, crossing her arms over her chest to take in the puppy version of Kara returning for a moment. "Didn't mean to startle you."

"How long was I asleep?" Kara relaxes her posture and wipes a hand over her face. A baby yawn escapes and she presses her fist to her mouth and rubs at her eyes..

 _Not nearly enough apparently._ "A couple of hours."

"A couple of - oh Rao.. Work.. the DEO… lunch with Lena… Did anything happen?" Kara feels her heart speeding up in her chest as she thinks about her sister. _Crap._ "Alex is going to kill me."

"Relax, I have it covered. You needed the sleep." Maggie leans back against the wall as she takes in the sight of the rambling supergirl. It was really hard to get annoyed at the hero both making their job as police easier and harder at the same time when she was such an adorable person.

A thought seems to slam into Kara's head at the mention of Maggie taking care of her sister for her. Maggie had to deal with a frustrated and probably worried Alex. She had been working when Kara had came in too...The blush is rising on her cheeks again that Maggie had to stop doing what she was working on to take care of her. "Oh my gosh… I didn't mean to put you out. I'm so sorry. You were working and I -"

Maggie takes a step off the wall and grabs a water bottle from the little shelf in the corner of the room. Taking a long drink before cutting Kara off. "You didn't. Promise."

"Thank you." She blushes waving her hand around "for all of this."

"For what letting you sleep on my gross office floor? If you weren't immune to pretty much everything I'd highly suggest a vaccine."

"You know what I meant." Suddenly the confident hero has trouble finding it in her to make eye contact with the detective. She makes a motion to stuff her hands into her pockets only to realize that she was in her suit and didn't have any. She really should talk to Winn about that, pockets are awesome. Supergirl settles for gripping her fists in her skirt instead and finding something on the floor very interesting.

"Yeah, anytime Little Danvers." _Don't mention it._

"I know we aren't super close but… thank you. You didn't have to do that. You don't have any obligation to me just because you're gonna marry my sister. I kinda feel like I used you. I'm so sorry."

"No, I get it. I'm glad you trust me. I need something similar sometimes." Maggie can't help but smile at the mention of marrying Alex. It's not her fault really, the older Danvers just made her so happy. She remembered a time when she never thought that would come. When she never thought she would deserve that kind of love and Alex showed her every single day. _Also stop apologizing_ "It's ok to need comfort, Kara. And it's ok to allow yourself to be comforted, too."

"I know." Maggie quirks an eyebrow - _do you?_ Kara drops her head and starts to put her cape back on. Her shoulders going from the more slouched position associated with the young reporter to the proud posture of Supergirl.

Maggie swears it actually hurts her heart to see… It's really as if she can see all the weight on Kara's back for a second. See how hard it was for her to push herself aside to go help others, in whatever capacity that may be. See how painful it was to put that armor back on. How painful it was to go back to pretending everything was great when that couldn't be further from the truth. "I gotta go, duty calls and all that."

"Want to get lunch sometime, just me and you?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'd like that." She offers a small smile tilting her head up she looks at Maggie through those long waves. As she opens the window again before taking a step back inside the room.

"If you need anything don't hesitate to call me. I'm here, any time. I mean it." Kara nods and is out the window in nearly the same motion. "Oh, Little Danvers… what am I gonna do with you?"

Finally alone back in the sky Kara allows herself to take stock. Aside from the initial wake up Kara feels more exhausted than she had before but at least it was something. Landing on the roof of the precinct she looks down to check her phone. A bunch of missed calls and texts from Alex. A few from Lena. Missed news updates send a string of vibrations through the device in her palm. She makes herself check the texts first, then she would deal with whatever disaster she probably had missed during her brief rest.

 **Lena** : I missed you at lunch today. I'm sorry. I'm not mad Kara, I'd never be mad at you for protecting yourself. Please text me back. I'm getting worried. Really worried.

 **Kara** : I am so sorry I missed lunch. It was not on purpose. I dozed off in Maggie's office for a little bit on accident. I wasn't avoiding you. Please don't worry. I'm ok.

 **Lena** : I have a feeling I'm always going to be a little bit worried. I'm glad you got some sleep. Have a nice day, Kara. Stay safe

 **Kara** : you too

Kara wanted to smile at Lena's teasing but she couldn't bring herself to do it. It was too much like what she had said to Mon-El about being mad. Which was no less true today as it was then. She is just a little mad that he isn't around. _Why'd he have to be from Daxam? Why'd they have to be allergic to lead?_ It was childish and she knew it but it helped… a little. It did… Maybe...

She just plane ignores the string of texts she had received from Alex and reads the last one that's timestamped about 30 minutes ago. Her sister texted too much. It was insane. If Kara could go with a flip phone she totally would but with both of her jobs it was damn near critical she was constantly connected.

 **Alex** : I love you, Kara. So much.

The sentimental texts from her sister had gotten heavier and more frequent in the last couple of months since the Daximite invasion. Kara didn't mind really. This one, however, brought a tear to her eye. Maggie must have at least told Alex a little bit about her falling asleep. She knew Alex was worried but her just telling Kara that she loved her instead of "checking-in" like she had been trying to do for the last three weeks was really touching. It helped. Even if it was only a little bit.

 **Kara** : love you too, be by the DEO soon. That meeting's at 4:40 right? I'm sorry I went MIA for a couple of hours

 **Alex** : Don't be, we got it covered. See you at the meeting. Dinner tonight, my place?

 **Kara** : yeah just let me know what time to swing by. I don't know how much time I'll have though

 **Alex** : ok

Kara finally allows herself to look at the news notifications to see that, yes, she had missed quite a big accident. People were dead. She suddenly regrets breaking down enough to let Maggie stroke her hair until she slept. **12 DEAD. TRAIN CRASH IN NEW YORK**. As soon as she reads it she's off to the city to help do what she can to make up for those lost when she could have saved the. If only she hadn't allowed that moment of weakness.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN**

 **Hey guys the story continues! Apparently the Universe has it out for Kara or it just wants to make her slow down.**

 **Let me know what ya'll think :) Please... please...please**

* * *

Upon arrival of the scene she puts out the remaining fires as quickly as she can and clears the remaining people from their entrapment using her xray vision. She helps the cars go upright all without much word to the local first responders. It doesn't take all that long, a little under two hours really, but cleaning up a mess she probably could have prevented was draining in the worst way. The police officer in charge of the screen gives her a thank-you full of gratitude that she doesn't much feel like receiving. She nods without a word and is off flying back to National City when she spots a large Alien smashing its way through a smaller city somewhere in the Midwest. The screams and sounds of destruction reaching her before she can even see it though.

She lands shortly, just in front of the massive alien-robot looking thing that lets out a deafening roar. She glances to the sign - Welcome to Carson City. _Ok, so not the_ _Midwest_ … she had made better time than she had thought. _Focus dummy. Big alien smashing a city._

"Hey! Stop. I don't want to hurt you." Another roar is timed with the alien reaching back to slam a metal fist into her body. She flies easily out of the way leaving a crater of smashed asphalt in her place where the fist had just connected with the empty road. "Fine. If that's how you're going to be…" _You wanna get punchy? Let's get punchy..._

She flies toward the weird mixture of scales and metal coating this 10 foot tall alien skin. She knocks it down a few times but eventually it lands a blow slamming her down into that very same asphalt. She struggles to her feet, eyes starting to glow in frustration. _Well if it's gonna be that way…_ she lets the heat vision release into the armored skin of her opponent when not two seconds later its sputtering to a halt. She lands from where she was hovering, her body no longer capable of flight. "Oh, crap."

The monster charges her realizing it had an opportunity. Kara fights him for a while, but her strength is fading. Where earlier her fists had easily sent the monster skidding backward they now graze off of the rough skin scraping her knuckles. It grabs her around the leg holding her up upside down when she spots a week spot under his chin… if only… She tries to swing to strike the weak spot in her if she could just get her leg to twist a little bit… _Screw it._ She knew this was about to hurt but she really didn't see another way. Using all the strength she had left she swings at an unnatural angle dislocating her hip she lets out a choked yell and connects her fist to the weak spot knocking the alien out cold.

She is tossed over its shoulder in the process as it falls to its back. She hits the stone wall of a building hard before falling to the ground with another thud. Her foot getting caught awkwardly beneath her, her ankle exploding with pain as she crumples against the wall. _Good. This is good._

Just in time her earpiece crackles to life with the sound of her sisters annoyed-you need to be more responsible voice, "Supergirl, where are you? All hands meeting started 5 minutes ago. I know you're dealing with a lot but this is unacceptable."

Kara had completely forgotten about that as she had gotten lost in thought yet again on her way back from New York. "Alex" she chokes unintentionally. Her breathing becoming rapid in the pain ripping through her nerves. "Alex, help."

"Kara what's wrong?" Her voice had immediately gone soft from it's edginess just moments before.

"Big alien. Carson City. No powers. Hurt."

"I'm coming, hold on." Alex is there in what seems like seconds and years later at the same time. J'hon landing softly by her side letting Alex check on Kara while he made sure the Alien was subdued. Kara was slumped against the wall, bruised, bloody, short of breath, and eyes a little bit glassed over. "Did you hit your head?"

"Not sure."

"What hurts?"

"What doesn't?" She tries to laugh but the tightening of her core only aggravates her ribs causing a soft groan to sneak out of her nose.

"Kara."

"Breathing. My right leg." Alex tries to run gentle hands over the mentioned leg to check for any dire situation but Kara winces when she places a hand hear her hip. There's a twitch as Kara reflexivly pulls away but stops herself.

"Sorry." Alex mummers before looking up at her a second before turning her attention back to the aforementioned hip.

"It's fine." She mutters through gritted teeth. Her attention stolen from the look in her sister's eyes calling her a lier by a DEO helicopter landing in the distance. "I think it might be dislocated."

"Kara! What the-"

"Just a hunch." She tries to push herself from the wall, stabbing pain in her ribs stopping her. "Ouff."She grunts as she lets her head fall back against the wall as Alex brown eyes bore into her. Really it is a miracle her sister doesn't have heat vision. Kara would have been vaporized long ago if she did…

Alex lifts her hands to the hip again trying to gently untuck the top of Kara's uniform from the skirt. Before shifting her against the wall so she could lay down. Kara's all too aware of all the movement, both from Alex moving her very much not "located" hip and the press starting to swarm their position. She tries to sit back up once Alex has her on the ground but a hand stops her. "Quit moving. You'll make it worse." Surly a photo of an injured supergirl would be great for the front page.

"Alex…"

"What!" She nearly yells. "You need to let me look."

"Not here." It's then her sister follows the wide blue eyes gazing just beyond her shoulder. Cameras flashing already. "Please. Not here."

Alex sighs and looks back to the injured hero with sad but understanding eyes. "Ok." She rubs her temples for a second too, hating herself for asking this next question. She didn't want Kara to move let alone try to walk but Supergirl had appearances to keep up and they both knew she had to try. "I'll look at it at closer at the DEO. Can you walk?" _Walk? I just told you I think I dislocated my hip, Alex, but sure, yeah, I can walk._

"Psh… yeah. Supergirl remember." Kara tries to stand up and fails unable to use her right leg, her muscles exhausted as she only tries to really use one leg pressing her sore ribs back into the building to help. Alex helps her with an extended arm and shifts to loop Kara's arm around her neck when her little sister takes a step away on her own. The hero nearly falls back to the pavement with a sharp intake of breath. "Nope. Nopenopenopenopenope." Alex is at her side instantly. Before Kara can get any closer to being back on the ground she is ducking under Kara's arm and wrapping her own arm around Kara's waste so their hips press together, much to Kara's discomfort. Kara has to fight from letting her eyes roll into the back of her head from the onslaught of pain that came with the collision of the two sister's hips. The agent's hand presses to Kara's abdomen to steady her as well, given that the hero is slightly taller than her. Also _much_ to Kara's discomfort.

"I've got you." She holds her little sister upright waiting on J'ohn to get there to help her. She turns to a junior agent and barks at him over her shoulder nodding toward the press. "Get them out of here. Fucking press." Alex gets too much of a kick out of ordering the boots around not too really. They're all terrified of her and J'ohn. It's hilarious actually. Those two are the biggest space teddy-bears if Kara had ever met any.

"I am the press." Kara tries to joke back, the soft chuckle disturbing her ribs just enough for a little noise of discomfort to make it to Alex's ears. It wasn't a whimper, that seemed too pathetic for how hard Kara was trying to not make her pain known, but more a hum from her nose.

"Hang in there. We'll get you back soon. And shut up. Right now you're law enforcement."

"Don't tell Maggie that."

Alex snorts a laugh at the expense of her fiance. The agent stands in silence with her hero after that though, feeling the heat radiating off of Kara and the shortness of the Kryptonian's breath as she's tucked close into her side straining to hold her upright. She keeps her hand on the injured Supergirl's stomach absentmindedly moving her thumb across the material of the suit in an attempt to comfort her hurting sister.

The martian slides under Kara's other arm after getting the offending alien into the second helicopter that had just landed. The two basically carry the battered hero back to their ride, helping her get settled in the back as painlessly as they can.

The ride is silent much to Kara's relief. She really didn't want to get scolded right now for being reckless. She just wanted… well she didn't really know what she wanted but her head was spinning and her eyelids felt incredibly heavy. When her head dropped forward in attempt to ride out the dizzy spell and save some energy Alex's hand shakes her shoulder softly. "You ok? Try to keep your eyes open, Kar."

"M'k." _Easy for you to say. Sleepy didn't just punch you in the face._

Her sister lets out a snort "Supergirl: knocked out by dwarf. I can see the headline now." _Oh, I said that out loud._

"Yes, dummy." Alex rests her hands on the straps over her shoulders as she lets out another laugh. "Almost there, doing great Supergirl."

Once the helicopter lands on the roof of the DEO they help Kara out slowly as the stubborn hero insists on doing it and not just letting them put her on a gurney to take her down to medbay. When Kara's foot hits the ground she turns away from her help to lose the contents of her stomach, suddenly much dizzier than she had been on the ride back. It splashes some Agent's feet and Kara looks up at them with an apology in her eyes.

"So you _did_ hit your head."

"Alex" _don't._ She feels much more awake now with fresh waves of pain running through her freshly moved leg. Also the puking helped with that too probably she supposed.

"I'm not nagging. I just need to know. I believe you that you didn't know. Ok?" She slides under Kara's arm bracing her against the helicopter to take the weight of her sister's imbalance yet again.

Kara's head drops forward again wiping her mouth with the back of her sleeve. "Yeah, sorry." Is muttered as they finally get to the elevator. Alex and another agent still basically carrying her into the medbay as she hops on her one working leg and gently deposit her on a cot.

"Kara, it's ok. We'll get you set here then get you home to rest." _Oh Rao… no. No, no-no-no. How long will it take to get my powers back to heal?_ Sitting around with nothing to do is literally the worst thing she could imagine right now, alone with her thoughts and means of distraction.

"Alex my hip. It really hurts and it's all catchy and weird and not working." Her voice goes scratchy as she lays her head against the pillow. _Did they get new pillows in here? About time._ And yeah her ankle was really hurting too but her help was worse, the pain was shooting up her side even and it was making it really hard to concentrate. Totally just the pain that was messing with her concentration though. Definitely not the concussion.

Alex glances from over her shoulder where she is digging into the medical supplies no doubt looking for some leads to stick to Kara's chest. "Well if you would have let me look at it in the field or I don't know.. used the fucking gurney…"

"Alex, please…" Kara lets her eyes close. Her head hurts and she really - _really_ \- didn't have the energy to fight with her sister right now. And Alex always got a bit _testy_ when she was worried about her. Her hip was killing her and her toes felt all weird.

"Ok. Think you can help me get this off of you or do I need to cut it off?" Alex gently starts pulling the blue material, already torn some the fight, from the waistband of her skirt. She's careful but it still doesn't feel great, not even a little. Kara gets the feeling that her torso is littered with bruises and scrapes, she can feel the shirt already pulling open some fresh scabs.

"Winn will be pissed." She half grunts half laughs through gritted teeth, hoping it looks more like a smile than a grimace. She had gone through more super-suits…

"Please he loves playing with the design. You didn't answer the question." She holds up the special scissors and snips at the air. Kara doesn't realize her teeth are chattering together as she quivers on the table straining against the pain as it grows with each passing moment.

She looks up into Alex's knowing brown eyes and gives her a short nod. _Cut it. I don't think I can move._

"Easy, Supergirl. Keep breathing." Alex rests a hand on her sister's upper arm for a second before making quick work of the suit.

"Easy for you to say." Kara chatters out as her teeth knock together. Alex initiates a sharp breath once her torso is revealed and Kara is out of the top. Her sister is cut and bruised all to hell. However, it does make her want to laugh a little bit that Kara now chooses to wear a sports bra under the suit. She didn't used to but with so many close calls and torn suits over the last year or so Kara really didn't like being that extra little bit exposed. In the moment she never cared that much as she was generally was a little out of it, but later when she realized she'd flashed everyone in the room the embarrassment and gotten to her. Aaaaaand there was that one time she had almost flashed half of National City.

Alex drapes a heated blanket over the shivering hero's legs despite the fact that she's not really shivering from the cold. It helps though as Kara takes a deeper breath and tries to relax. "Don't be so dramatic. We've all had our share of broken ribs." Alex snorts as she sticks the leads to Kara's very purple upper half applying as little pressure as she could. After hooking Kara up she moves the portable Xray to take pictures of her sisters chest, hip, ankle and head. She was kidding though, and Kara knows it. Teasing helps Alex deal with the worry and the guilt that creeps up for her not being able to protect her baby sister from this, even with her superpowers.

She cleans the cuts and scrapes quickly making sure to blow on each one after wiping it with the alcohol swab. Kara had started with her neck straining to hold her head up to watch but after a while she gave up and just let Alex work quietly. One hand reaching up to rub Kara's upper arm when it wasn't busy applying bandages. The doctor usually didn't bother, as the cuts would be gone in a few hours tops of Kara laying in the sunbed but she had a feeling this one would be a few days.

"Alright, Kar. Ready to take care of this hip?" She cuts the skirt off and lets it fall against the bed and gets rid of the boots quickly as well, cutting the right one away from a clearly broken ankle. That would have to wait though.

The blue eyed hero lifts her head a moment to look down at the very unnatural lump where her hip is poking through her running spandex. Kara makes quick eye contact with her sister who only smiles softly in apology before the hero lets her head drop back down to the pillow. "Let's just get this over with."

Alex squeezes her hand in gentle reassurance before checking the joint. The moment her fingers touch the hip through the fabric of Kara's preferred spandex on-the-job-underwear the blonde sucks in a chestful of air much too quickly and presses her head back into the table. Her other leg bending at the knee as if she were about to push away. Alex wraps her inside arm around the blonde's thigh gripping near that very same sore spot getting in position to set the hip, noticing that Kara has yet to breathe out.

"Kara. You have to breathe. You're very annoying to deal with when you're unconscious."

Some air escapes the young hero's lungs as she mutters "Just do it already." So Alex does. Luckily it wasn't completely out so it was a quick twist of practiced hands but it had been out enough. Kara yelled through the lip held tight between her teeth and arched off the table just enough with her upper back. She was panting now, even with the broken ribs, sweat beading on her forehead. A watery laugh found its way into the room though almost immediately as her hand wiped tears from her cheeks that Alex had yet to see from where she was trying to gently lay the leg back down. "Ouch."

"You good?" The older sister takes the hero's shaking hand from the bed beside her hip where it was fisted into the thin sheet covering the table. She wipes her hand over Kara's scrunched forehead taking sweat and stray hairs with it. The hero lets out yet another shaking breath as she tries to slow her breathing. "Talk to me, Sis."

Blue eyes finally peek out from clenched eyes to look sheepishly up at her older sister. "Yep. Good. Hardly felt a thing."

Tears leaking from the corner of her eyes beg to differ. "Kar-"

"I'm good." She turns her head to look at her sister who is still holding her hand. They both knew she wasn't. That hurt like a bitch but Alex still had to cast her ankle and Kara had every intention of letting herself not be ok for a second as soon as that was done. Her sister nods and gets to work wrapping her ankle, not without noticing Kara white knuckling the sides of the bench.

Kara is still straining against the bed when Alex finishes. Alex stands over her allowing her hand to cup the side of her sisters face and rub her thumb softly against the curve of Kara's cheeks now wet with tears. "Hey, hey, hey. Kara, look at me." Kara's bright blue eyes come into view beneath her dark wet eyelashes. "We're done." She lets go of Kara's cheek a second to move a hair behind her sisters ear before moving back to bracing her face. "What can I do?"

"Can you grab my clothes from my locker? I just want to get out of here."

"You think you'll be able to get into those pants you keep around?" Alex snorts out a laugh. The pants her sister kept were her usual form fitting chinos. No shot were those going to get over the cast.

"I can't exactly wear DEO sweats back can I? I'm sure my neighbors are already curious enough with everything that happens in my apartment."

"Fair point. I'll see what we have around." Alex bends over to kiss Kara's krinkle, now formed as she thinks about how much she doesn't want to go home but how much she really doesn't want to stay here. "Close your eyes for a little bit, Kar. I'll be back." With that Alex is out the door.

The hurting kryptonian twists her head against the pillow to find her phone on the instrument table and grabs it, suffering through a uncomfortable pull at her ribs at the movement. She opens her phone to find the the light is quite bothersome to her eyes and building headache. The concussion becoming more obvious not that the pain in her hip and ankle are calming down a little bit. A missed text from Lena makes her push through the throbbing, that pared with the spinning makes her head feels like it's wobbling on an axis more than anything.

 **Lena** : Are you ok?

 _I saw the news._ Kinda goes without saying at this point, Kara supposes.

 **Kara** : yes

 **Lena** : What is hurt? You better tell me

 **Kara** : I'm ok. I swear. Just a little banged up

 **Lena** : Kara Danvers you better tell me. I will call Alex

Kara huffs out in frustration. What was with everyone and threatening her with contacting her sister today? This was like the third freaking time.

 **Kara** : mid-grade concussion, broken ankle, dislocated hip and some separated/cracked ribs. But I promise, Lena, I'm fine.

 **Lena** : As your boss, you are officially on a medical leave of absence for 2 weeks or until your powers come back.

 **Kara** : Don't be ridiculous. That's excessive.

(She wanted to say: This is exactly why I didn't tell you I was supergirl. But Kara quickly deletes that as soon as she types it, that would not be the best thing to say here probably.)

That's when Alex comes in and not-so-gently pulls her phone from her hands. "No, Kara. No texting. You have a concussion."

"But Al-" She tries to sit up leaning on her elbows only to be met with a firm but cautious hand on her shoulder pushing her back down.

"Don't you "but Alex" me. You're hurt. You need rest." As if that were the final word Alex turns her attention to Kara's phone as Kara gives a defeated huff. Her hand falling to rest across her still bare stomach. The blonde is still shaking a little bit but that much pain will do that to anybody.

 **Kara** : Lena, this is Alex. Thank you. She won't be texting anymore b/c concussion. Feel free to stop by later if you're free. I'm sure she will appreciate the company.

 **Kara** : and by that I mean come over. I have a feeling she's going to need it.

 **Lena** : I will. Let me know if I can do anything. Take care of her.

 **Kara** : easier said than done… see you later

The two stay relatively quiet as Kara sits up, more like Alex helps her up but she didn't really want to admit that. After holding Kara steady for a long moment against her chest Alex gets her twisted on the bed. The exhaustion now clear in those distant blue eyes. First, and as quickly as she can, Alex helps Kara into a training bra that will be much more comfortable than her current red sports bra. The older sister slides a simple grey flowy shirt she found in Lucy's stuff over Kara's head. She slides the jean shorts over Kara's cast and up as far as she can before helping the young woman off of the bed. Kara's hand on her shoulder as she pulls the shorts up the rest of the way as she fastens the zipper and button.

"You doin ok?" Alex hands Kara a pair of crutches and slides her glasses over her eyes. Her hand lingers a moment on Kara's cheek. The blonde hero lets herself lean into her sister's touch for the first time in months.

"I'll get there." She smiles sadly looking up at her sister through her eyelashes from where she had let her head bow forward a little. Kara let the handles dig little bit into her armpits as she leaned into her crutches. Alex lets out a sigh as her hand falls to her hip-that was the closest thing to an honest answer to that question she'd gotten in three months. The moment interrupted by a knock on the medbay door indicating that one of her little boots had brought her car up to the door. Kara can't help but snort at her sister's _slight_ abuse of power.

"OK Superstar. Let's get you home." Kara nods in attempt to speak without giving away with how _not_ ok with that she is. The car ride is quite, largely because Kara's head was leaned back against the headrest, her eyes closed, and Alex's hyper awareness of how terrible her sister was actually feeling.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN-**

 **I thouhgt I'd give yall one a little early bc my week is crazy and I know I'll forget to post on Tuesday. So here it is.**

 **More comfort and angst and Kara feeling like crap in general. I really like this chapter. Hope you guys do to.**

 **Let me know!**

* * *

Parking the car and helping Kara out is an entirely different struggle then getting her up into the SUV was. Luckily Alex got a spot by the elevator, Kara really wasn't sure how she'd make it much farther than that 20 feet.

Making it to her door would prove very difficult as it was about 60 feet from the elevator. By the time Kara crutches from the elevator to her door she's exhausted. The pain in her ribs sharp from the press of the upper handle and her scraped palms stinging against where they hold nearly the entirety of her body weight against the not so cushioned rubber.

Alex watches her with careful understanding as she unlocks the door. She had used crutches more than should really be ok. She knew the press of those crutches into sore ribs was quite possibly the worst. She's always impressed with Kara when she gets hurt, in a quietly proud kind of way. Her little sister was the farthest thing from a wimp you could get. She didn't complain. She didn't whine. She was so tough and took it like a champ. Especially considering that usually when she did get hurt it was pretty bad.

Though at the same time as being proud of her sister's composure she was a little put-off by it as well. She wanted Kara to be able to hurt without fear of what Alex would think if she wasn't so tough all the time. It also made caring for her more difficult than it needed to be. "Let's get you settled."

"Alex, I told you, I'm fine." Alex almost snorts a laugh at her sister's confirmation of her inner dialog about trying to be tough. _Bull shit you're fine._

"I am not going to even dignify that with a response." Kara sits slowly on the couch and Alex joins her a minute or so later handing her a glass of water and a couple of pills. If she was being honest since sitting down Kara feels like she's stepped onto one of those spinny carnival rides her and Alex would always try out in the summer against Eliza's advice. They only ever regretted it if they did the junk food ally visit before the ride, however. This, Kara thinks, feels a lot like that.

She squeezes her eyes shut gripping her knee with one hand and the handles of the crutches with the other in a meager attempt to steady herself. Alex takes her crutches from her hand and lays them down against the bottom of the couch, both of Kara's hands grabbing at her knees now. "Dizzy?"

Her head bobs a little bit in a really sad attempt of a nod where it was ducked forward. "A little. S'ok though."

Alex puts an empty bowl on the coffee table and scoots it closer to the couch to be in easy reach incase Kara feels the need to get sick again. She scoots closer to the still spinning blonde careful not to make any shift on the cushion that might aggravate Kara's hip. Kara's head was resting on her hands now trying to find a balance of squeezing her head enough to help slow the spinning but not hard enough to make the pounding worse. Alex knew that struggle all too well. "We should get your leg up and you should get some sleep."

"Alex." _Not sleep. Please not sleep. Also, don't baby me. I'm an adult._ The young woman drops her left arm and tilts her head to look at her older sister. If the look was supposed to carry any meaning, it's not found. Her eyes are a little glassed over and her eyelids droopy over those beautiful blue eyes.

Fine, if Kara didn't want to sleep they could talk for a little bit first. Alex felt a little bit bad in taking advantage of Kara's current state to get her talking but at this point she really didn't know what else to do. "Care to tell me how you blew your powers? Does it maybe have something to do with late nights - or rather never ending nights - at CatCo and the DEO?" The sassy older sister tilts her head and raises a knowing eyebrow.

"I can't sleep. Ok?" Alex doesn't respond in hope of teasing out more from her sister. She had finally gotten her to talk a little bit, she didn't want to scare Kara back inside her head "I haven't slept more than a few hours total since…"

"How long?" Alex rubs slow circles on Kara's back where she is still bent over, head in her hands, looking into the floor.

Kara takes a moment and sits up and slowly leans back against the back of the couch, letting her head drop to rest against the cushion behind her. "Six-"

"Days?"

Kara shakes her head slowly, a blush rising up on her cheeks as she looks down and away from an increasingly concerned Alex. "Weeks." She mumbles her correction preparing for a full blown explosion about how irresponsible that was. "Six weeks."

"Kara-" The hurting girl's eyes well up with tears at the soft utterance of her name. Alex knew she was struggling, that much was obvious from her change in demeanor but she didn't realize it was this bad. _Six weeks? Jesus._ She would have been more mad if Kara had said 6 days. She wished she could have been mad but Alex felt her heart breaking as she watched her sister carefully.

"I know, ok? I know. I should be sleeping, taking care of myself better. I tried at the beginning Alex, I really did. I promise I did. I'd lie awake for hours staring at his empty side of the bed. Trying to remember what it was like to have him there. What it felt like. How cute he was when he smiled in his sleep. Then I memorized my ceiling. If I'd actually doze off I'd get nightmares and wake up 20 minutes later so I stopped trying. If I was going to be awake I might as well be productive, rebuild the city I destroyed. Protect people better- I can cover a few major cities this way. Write more. I didn't see the point in trying anymore."

"K-" She starts to talk but Alex really didn't know what to say yet but her sister, her little sister, looked so broken as she tilted her head back to look at that same ceiling she said she'd memorized in her bedroom. She was fighting so hard to keep tears from spilling over her eyelashes and Alex wished, just for a second, that she would quit- give up fighting- and just let her help. Even if that was just letting Alex hold her while she finally let herself feel her grief in entrity.

"Please, Alex. I know. I don't want a lecture and I _really_ don't want to talk about it. It's sad and pathetic but it's how it is. So, please, let's not talk about it." She didn't want to talk about how people's hugs just reminded her of his hugs and that really hurt her heart. Or how gentle soothing touches reminded her of the way he would hold her when she was at her lowest. Or how even bacon didn't make her excited anymore. Or about the book all underlined to hell beneath her bed in a box of his things that she wasn't even sure if he had finished. She didn't want to talk about how she spent as little time in her apartment as possible anymore for those same reasons. It just felt so… _empty._ But it also felt like he would pop his head in the door at any moment and moronically yell _HONEEEEYYYY I'm HooooOOOOMEEEE_ and then everything would be better when he smiled at her and picked her up in a hug before ruining the kiss he would surely plant on her lips with a smile. _Damn, that smile._

"Why didn't you tell me? I could have tried to help?"

"Do what? Sing me to sleep? No it's ok. This isn't something you can fix for me. This isn't something you can protect me from. And that's ok." Kara had thought about it a few times, asking Alex to come over, to see if it would actually help. She didn't want to pull her sister away from Maggie though. She knew both of them would have been more than fine with it, insisted even, but it was a small comfort to know that they were spending time together. That at least they were happy.

"Are you mad at me? You push me away, you brush off my hugs… You fly off as quickly as you can. We don't talk anymore. We haven't done a sister's night in months… You don't come out to the bar anymore. Eliza said you've stopped calling. You can't seem to stand being in the same room as me anymore..."

"No, Alex, no… I'm not upset with you. It helps knowing that you are so happy. I promise." Kara looks at her sister. She knew that Alex was worried, probably even a little bit hurt from Kara pulling away but it had to be this way. Kara couldn't lose Alex like that and pulling away made it easier to not think about it. She also didn't really want to be comforted even though her bones screamed for it.

"What is it then?" _Kara please tell me_. She wants to beg her sister to let her in. Grab her by the shoulders and shake her until she comes to her senses. But she also doesn't want to push her too far because she can't stand the thought of Kara closing off any more than she already has. It's breaking her damn heart. "Kara, please. _Please_."

She wants to say: _Every time someone touches me I wish it was him. Every hug, every squeeze of a hand, every forehead or temple kiss. Even though I don't think I could handle this if you weren't happy, you and Maggie make me wish that things could be different. I see you two and I see everything I will never be able to have. Sitting still for longer than 30 minutes makes me anxious. Focusing on anything is hard enough, I'd never make it through a movie. I can't eat and that'd just make you more worried_. And that wasn't even a fraction of everything she was thinking, but instead she bites her tongue and stuffs it deeper inside for another day.

"I can't…" the blonde nearly chokes out with a sob, hanging onto an ounce of control. "I can't put it into words." She could though couldn't she? Her thoughts were in words. Why couldn't she just let them past her lips? Wanting to tell Alex everything she'd been holding in for the last few months and breakdown completely in her sister's arms but also knowing that once she did that she didn't know how to go from there. Here, at least, she knew to just keep trudging forward and eventually one day it wouldn't feel like this.

"Try."

 _I want to so badly Alex, I wish I could but it won't solve anything and I already know what you're going to say so what's the point? The idea of talking about it makes me feel so weak and I really can't handle that._ "Why? Talking won't make it better. Words… words mean nothing. They solve nothing." She verbalizes what she's been telling herself for months. _It won't help. You already know what she'll say. There's no point._

Kara thinks she might have actually broken something inside her sister when she tells her that. Alex shoulders deflate just a little too much and it actually looks like she'd punched her in the gut for a second. "Kara, your words have helped more people, have helped me, more…" It's then her hand finds the side of the struggling hero's face, making her turn her head to look at Alex instead of the newest interesting spot on the floor. Alex drops her voice to a whisper in seeing those deep blue eyes Kara knows only fit with Mon-El's description of _comets._ "What are you afraid of?"

 _You looking at me with more worry and sadness in your eyes. You looking at me like I'm broken. You being upset I'm jealous of what you have with Maggie. You thinking it's silly for me to feel like this after a couple of months of an up-and-down relationship. That once I let myself feel all of it I won't be able to put myself back together because you know as well as I do, that as much as I love him, this is not just about Mon-El._

She has to look away again at that, the tears welling up in Alex's eyes too are too much. _Rao this is all too much._ "I'm not afraid of anything. I just truthfully think that there is no point in talking about it. I'm not human, Alex. I can't pretend to be any longer." _It hurts too much_. A shiver runs through her as the room falls silent. Was her apartment always this cold? "I'm going to change."

"No, you stay put. I'll grab you something and help you." She stands. Kara's surprised she's not mad. Usually her being this stubborn and frankly, stupid, warranted some of Alex's mamma-bear tendicies to come out. Kara was thankful they were past that point, but a little scared too. Was she really that far gone? Alex seemed to have given up and Alex Danvers _never_ gives up. "No, trust me. Crutches suck and trying to do things is a lot harder than you'd think. With that concussion you really need to keep your heart rate down and not exert yourself. Not to mention pressing crutches against jacked up ribs is quite possibly the worst thing. Like ever. Let me at least help you with this." Kara hears the plea in the way her sister nearly goes breathless as she speaks to her. Besides, who was she kidding, there really wasn't any way she was going to be able to do that on her own anyway.

Alex comes back to see Kara bent over with her eyes closed, hand squeezing her thigh on her hurt side as if trying to get it to relax to offer some relief to her aching hip. "How are you doing?"

"My head is still spinning and it feels all foggy and throbby." She decides to answer honestly. Really what good is lying going to do at this point anyway? At the very least it gives her cover to be a little bit less put together if she couldn't keep everything in check.

"Welcome to your first concussion Little Sis." Alex bends over to kiss the top of Kara's head. "The best thing to do is sleep, let your brain heal itself." Kara huffs as she leans her head forward against the hard part of Alex's hip. Her older sister's hand gently running the flat of her hand over the back of Kara's head and letting her fingers slide through the blonde waves. _Rao, this feels nice. Even if Alex's hip is a little bit boney._

They stay like that a moment until Kara leans back into the couch with a choked groan, frustration getting the better of her. "Of course. Of course it is. I can't sleep and that's the only thing that will help. I've been staying busy to turn off my thoughts and I can't distract myself with anything. I stand but what I said, Kara Danvers sucks right now." _The sad girl whose boyfriend left. I still don't like that girl, Alex._ She also didn't like that she was this torn up over her _boyfriend_. The word seems so inconsequential. He wasn't her husband, or her fiance, he never would be. They were just two people at the start of a relationship-one she had never seen coming to an end but that really didn't matter anymore. They were just two people who could never be together again. That's it. It seems weak. But it also felt like _boyfriend_ didn't cover the half of what Mon-El was to her. "And now I'm trapped as _that_? I don't get it. What did I do? Rao, What did I do to deserve this?" She almost slaps a hand over her mouth for blabbering that last bit… she really hadn't intended to.

"Kara Danvers is still my favorite." Alex kneels in front of her trying to meet her sister's eyes. She does for a second before Kara drops her head in defeat. A couple small tears sneaking past that dam she was trying so hard to build. Alex shifts forward and lets her sister's head rest against her shoulder, her hand resting on the back of Kara's neck. "Kara Danvers will _always_ be my favorite." She kisses the line where that soft blonde hair meets a now wrinkled forehead.

The younger of the two Danver's tries to wipe her tears on the back of her hand. "Even when I'm being an idiot?" That's not what Kara means though, not really. _Even when I'm broken? Even when I'm weak? Human?_

"Especially when you're being an idiot." And of course Alex meant it in the ways her sister refused to say too. Kara lets her cup her cheeks and wipe away the remaining tears with a small nod, and frankly still quite tearful gaze, but neither one wanted to comment on that. Sensing that Kara was about at her emotional limit Alex takes mercy on her sister, "Ok, dummy, time to get you out of Lucy's clothes."

Kara nods with a tearful laugh as she tries to smile. "That is in no way an admission of any kind."

"No, of course not." The older sister snorts a laugh and lets her hand fall away from Kara's cheek. Alex's hands go to the hem of the shirt and gently pull it up and over Kara's head. To her sister's credit she only twitches the corner of her mouth in a small wince. Alex knew from experience that it warranted at least a stifled grunt. Getting a look at her sister's torso from this angle though makes Alex let out a low whistle. "Damn, that thing really did a number, huh?"

Kara looks up at her and chuckles a little bit before realizing that, yeah, laughing did not feel great . "Really? Hadn't noticed?"

"No kidding?" Alex jokes taking a sip of her own water. "You'd think-"

She's cut off by two quick knocks and the voice of their favorite CEO. "Delivery for Danvers."

Alex cuts off her laugh to yell at the women to come in. And come in she does, arms full of bags. "Brought the favorites. Pot-stickers for Kara, and crab rangoons for Alex." She shuts the door with the heel of her foot and steps further into the apartment, kicking off her heels in a smooth practiced motion.

"Lena," Kara gasps in pain from where she is twisted around the side of the couch to see, her curiosity outweighing her will to remain still and minimize her discomfort. "You didn't have to bring all of that."

"Don't be silly." Lena places the bags on the table and walks to the side of the couch to see a shirtless (but not bra-less) Kara. She turns away immediately, red rushing to her cheeks. She's aware that Kara can be shy sometimes while not others with almost no hint as to which way the blonde will be feeling and it had caught her a little bit off guard for her to been feeling so comfortable. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I'll give you some privacy."

"No, Lena. It's ok." Kara reaches out and catches her forearm. She really wasn't shy about her body, not like this when around her friends. Certainly not around Alex.

Ok, Kara was a little shy about her body most the time but not in her apartment. Besides she'd changed shirts in front of Lena before when she was helping her pick out something to wear. Pretty much as long as her _bits_ were covered, Kara didn't mind. This was no different, except for maybe the hundred-thousand abrasions littering her upper body. That made it slightly more intense.

"Your help would actually be great." Alex calls from over her shoulder as she walks back toward Kara's bedroom.

Lena gasps as she looks at the dark bruises covering Kara's torso and arms with a little more focus. Some hidden by what looks like an adult version of a training bra. Not that Kara has much of a chest anyway. Lena notes that it looks like it's gentle on Kara's battered skin. _Good._ She can't help but take in the form before her. What she is sure is usually perfect, flawless tanned skin is more purple and green with bandages and minor cuts scattered across it like some small child's run at a collage for school. Also the way her skin seems to pull around her muscles and bones even looks uncomfortable. She realizes she's looked too long inventorying every little scrape on the best friend's torso moving upward toward her face when she catches a concerned look at Kara's tired eyes. "I'm ok."

Lena is endeared by her friends concern for how Lena would react to her being injured, taking a moment to comfort her when she knew Kara was in desperate need of relief. She wants to call her out for being a liar because, no way is her skin that bruised and she this ok, but Alex walks back. Lena notices that she's holding up a roll of ace bandage and a soft looking long sleeve t-shirt that Lena thinks looks vaguely familiar from a time she had gotten coffee with the couple.

Kara's face drips immediately from the smile meant to comfort her friend over her injuries to wide-eyed near panic as the color drains from her usually rosy cheeks "Can you grab a different shirt?" Kara couldn't get herself to get rid of his things, but she also couldn't really stomach the reminder either. It was a very precarious balance and yet another battle she was struggling to fight.

"It'll be easier to slide on without moving too much." Alex argues as she takes a step further into the living area still looking at the shirt and not noticing the change in her sister's expression. She wasn't really concerned with the shirt at all really, just that it would be the easiest to put on that she could find. She didn't want to make Kara more uncomfortable then she had too.

"It was…" She does however look up when she hears Kara's voice crack in the middle of a sentence. "It was his. Please." Her little sister drops her head embarrassed that it still matters if she can smell his cologne or be around his clothes. Kara wishes she could hug his shirt up close, press her face in it and remember what he smelled like, what he felt like. She wants to be able to grieve that way for a little while, to let that comfort her for a moment, but she didn't trust herself. It's as if she knew that doing so would cause her to lose what little control she had left and that simply could not happen. Too many people depended on her for her to allow herself to break like that. She needed to live up to be the hero Mon-El thought she was even though she rarely felt like it any more.

"Ok. No worries. I'll be right back." Alex gives her best reassuring smile and tries to hurry to grab a new shirt that hopefully wouldn't be a reminder for her. "Sorry."

"It's ok. You didn't know. You were just trying to help." She smiles again and Alex can't help but wonder when her little sister good at faking it. It looked like the real deal for the most part and Alex wouldn't have even questioned it in most other circumstances which is really weird because Kara was quite possibly the world's worst liar. A reminder comes to the front of her mind though when Kara had accused her of the same thing, and she had responded that it was a good cover if people _thought_ you were a bad liar.

With Alex in the other room looking for a suitable shirt, Kara thought her sister was crazy, her shoulders were fine if not a little bit stiff. She could put on a freaking normal sized shirt, she wasn't _that_ beat up. The other woman in the room had been standing off to the side letting the sisters work it out but Kara's attention is called back to her when she pulls a chair in from the kitchen table to sit where Kara could easily see her without twisting. "Thank you, again, for bringing food over. You didn't have to do that."

"Of course I did, Kara. You're my best friend." Lena flashes her a bright toothy smile only made to look larger with the stark red lipstick she claims is a _Lena Luthor signature look._ "Besides someone has to make sure you are actually eating."

"I eat." Lean huffs out her protest almost immediately. It had become obvious that her best friends appetite had disappeared when the snacks constantly provided by Kara had become non-existent and Kara had only ordered a small meal when she would actually take the time to grab lunch with Lena. There's a shift in the room as Kara considers the woman sitting in front of her "I just thought…" _you'd be really mad and hurt and wouldn't want to see me for a while._

"You being Supergirl does not change anything." Lena leans forward in her chair toward the woman who she though would surely be babbling by now in the way she tends to when she's nervous. "I mean it. Kara Danvers is still my hero."

Kara blushes at that and looks away. Not wanting Lena to see the truth about Kara Danvers in her shining blue eyes. _Kara Danvers is weak. Kara Danvers is pathetic._ When Lena had first told her that she nearly cried on the spot. She always felt so inadequate as Kara Danvers but for someone to pick the nervous girl of a nobody over the cape pretty much blew her mind. "Don't you want to know why? Why I lied for so long?"

"Yes of course I'm curious, but I'm not going to push you to tell me. It's your secret to tell, Kara. I have no right… besides I have my theories." Lena tilts her head in true Lena Luther fashion still smiling at Kara as if to encourage her to talk when she's ready.

The girl of steal takes a deep breath before starting, running her hands over the material on the couch to rid them of the nervous moisture on her palms. "It's not because your a Luther."

Lena laughs at that. She knew it wasn't. That was never even a question. Not with Kara. "I know. I that concern never even crossed my mind. This is you we're talking about. Video evidence wasn't even enough to convince you I was guilty, Kara."

The blonde nods and a lump slides down her throat as she presses forward with the explanation. "It puts you in some danger but I really just liked how our friendship was. You didn't have to worry, you didn't expect anything. It was just me. I felt like I could be genuine around you and that was something rare. Everyone else expects a lot of me even if they don't mean to and you had no reason too."

"I understand. It's ok.

"You deserved to know."

Alex walks back in after finally finding a satisfactory shirt before Lena can say anything more to lighten some of the guilt Kara kept on her shoulders. Alex holds open the bottom opening of the shirt and helps Kara slide it over her head. The older sister tugs the bottom down for her sister once her arms are through. As Lena watches she gets a little bit nostalgic of watching Sam help Ruby into a shirt while they were in college and she was just a little thing.

Alex kneels down in front of Kara, carefully she starts to remove the shoe and sock from Kara's good foot "I can do that you know."

Alex rests her forearm on her knee still knelt on the floor in front of her sister. The shoe and sock already set behind her out of the way. She lets out a sigh at the stubbornness in the young Kryptonian "Just relax, ok?" _Give yourself a break for 5 minutes. I know every time you move it makes it worse._

"Fine." Kara huffs, puffing air up her face to move a stray hair tickling her cheek. Alex shakes her head and helps her slide into one of her fuzzy socks. Lena feels a wide smile spread across her cheeks as she watches Kara pull the collar of her shirt up to her nose with both hands to hide the lower half of her face and rub the soft worn cotton to the underside of her nose. Alex sits back on her heels placing her hands on her thighs and looks up at her sister with a soft but amused smile. Kara doesn't notice, her eyes closed lightly either fighting off the sleep pulling at her conscious or allowing herself to revel in a moment of comfort for once. If she had noticed the way the women were watching her she certainly would have said something or put the walls back up. Lena and Alex both find themselves missing the days when Kara would have just blushed and leaned into the comfort.

"Kara," Alex probes gently still from her spot on the floor. She reaches up and tucks some escaped golden locks behind the girl's ear.

"Hmmmmm?" Kara hums in question. _Let me be Alex I'm so tired and my hip finally stopped screaming at me._

"Ready to get into more comfortable pants?" Alex holds a pair of baggy cotton sweats up Kara always keeps around. The blonde opens her eyes and slowly drops her hands nodding but not without betraying a little weariness at moving her hip to stand up again. It really hurt. "We'll go slow." Alex lays the pants down on the coffee table and puts the ace bandage on top of them trying to reassure the hesitant blonde before her. She only stands up when Kara gives a more determined nod of permission. "Lena if you'd let her lean into you while-"

"Absolutely." Lena walks over to the other side of the coffee table and grabs Kara's arm on her her good side while Alex helps her from the other side. A small yelp gets lost in the otherwise quiet apartment as they pull Kara to her feet. Lena immediately ducks to loop the blonde's arm over her shoulders to let Kara lean nearly all of her weight into her. Lena circles the hurting hero's waste with her arms as gently as she could while steadying her.

Alex helps to hold her upright with a hand on her back and belly button from where she knows Kara wants to bend forward to attempt some relief from the fresh waves of pain surly ripping through her nerves. She presses a little harder then would be comfortable for Kara when she starts to wobble on her feet trying to shift further into Lena. "Easy Kar. We've got you."

Kara drops her head sideways allowing it to rest on top of Lena's shoulder and using the CEO's neck to keep her head from falling anymore forward. Despite the relaxed exhaustion controlling Kara's head as it must feel too heavy for her neck to hold up, Lena feels muscles strain against her right arm. Kara's abs flexing against her forearm where it tries to brace her from falling forward. "Give me a second." She murmurs against Lena's blazer's lapel. Her right hand gripping the fabric at Lena's left hip as she gives a feeble attempt to balance herself and calm her breathing back down.

"Take your time." Lena feels Supergirl shaking against her so she dips her head down to press a gentle kiss to the top of her head knowing there was little else she could do to offer any comfort. Her and Alex shared a pained look of concern and understanding as Kara struggles against her chest, Lena doesn't have to see to know those beautiful blue eyes are screwed shut. Lena wishes she could move her arms from bracing the girl's middle to rub her arm or her back and soothe her that way but that would only end with a broken Kryptonian on the floor. "Lean into me, Kara. It's ok."

Alex is on her knees in front of her sister silently waiting for the OK to move forward. "Ok." Kara breathes out opening her eyes. "Ok, I'm ready. Sorry."

"Don't apologize for that. You're hurt, Kara. It's ok if you need a second."

"Yeah, but.."

"No buts, nope. There is absolutely no reason to be sorry." Alex looks into those glacial eyes swirling with pain. "You ready, Sis?" Kara lifts her head from Lena's shoulder and gives her sister a nod. When Alex moves her hands up to the belt on Kara's shorts the Kryptonian reaches down to help, releasing her hand from Lena's now very wrinkled blouse. She lets Alex do the belt buckle but struggles through the button and zipper on the shorts, her brow knit in concentration.

Kara tenses against Lena and her hand flies back to grip at Lena's blouse again when Alex starts peeling the waste band from Kara's hips. She sucks her bottom lip between her teeth with a sharp intake of air that doesn't seem to quite reach her lungs and bites down hard enough to draw blood. "Sorry." Alex whispers as she continues to work the shorts down Kara's legs.

"S'ok." Kara chatters out through her clenched teeth, the quaking returning to her body with fresh waves of pain. "I'm ok."

"Not very believable at the moment there, Supergirl." Alex chuckles at her sister trying to make her feel better. The blonde finally stops shaking when her long tanned legs further exposed from where the shorts stopped at Kara's mid thigh. The muscles obviously straining to keep her upright as the twitches in the fibers are visible beneath the taut skin scattered with bruises. Her running spandex cover the top parts of her thighs, just below the hinge of her hip, not doing much to hide the gruesome discoloration of the offending joint.

Lena is glad she can't see the bruise on Kara's right hip, especially after Agent "hardass" Danvers inhales sharply in sympathy. Alex, however, wastes no time in helping Kara slide the shorts over the cast and off her bad leg. Lena squeezes the blonde ever so slightly when she lets a small cry pass her clenched teeth. "Hang in there Kar, this one's going to hurt a little." Alex warns hinting for Lena to lift Kara slightly to allow her to step out of the other side. Kara maneuvers a little bit to help but when shaky tearful breath of "oh ho ho" gets out the hero accidentally lets the two women know just how much pain she is in. Thank Rao for Alex though for possessing the skill slide the new pants under the foot in one motion.

Alex grabs the ace bandage off the table behind her and looks up at Kara who is watching her carefully. The older sister reaches forward and grabs one of the pillows off of the couch and puts it down in front of Kara's bad leg. "Rest your cast on this pillow so you're leg is a little bit forward. I'm going to do what's called a SPICA. It should help."

Alex adjusts as she kneels in front of Kara wrapping the first loop around her thigh as gently as she can. She then reaches to wrap the bandage around her hip pulling the elastic tight for support. Kara just lets Lena hold her up as her sister makes quick but uncomfortable work of wrapping her hip. She no longer had the energy to even try to make it look like she was holding herself up and decided to surrender completely to her sister and best friend's help.

When Alex is done she sits back on her heels and looks back up into Kara's clear blue eyes still a little bit watery from the movement and exertion. She's still trying to smile though and it warms Alex's heart to see her sister smile again despite the pain, it seems real, and it's clear Kara is thankful for the help even if words aren't coming easily to her at the moment. "See how that feels." She rests her hands on her thighs just a second until she see's Kara's pained determination to try and move her own leg back under her hips. At that look, the disappearance of the soft smile, Alex reaches forward and guide's Kara's leg back as gently as she can.

"Thank you."

"Yeah, absolutely." Alex pops back up to her feet into a squat, content with taking the small victory. The older sister stands from where she was squatted as she pulls the pants back up careful not to touch Kara's hip too much even with the added support of the wrap. It will be incredibly tender for at least a week if it takes that long for her powers to come back. Alex had never dislocated her hip but she could only imagine how painful this must be for Kara.

Lena braces herself as the blonde still flinches away from the touch and further into the CEO's hold. She watches Kara biting down hard on her lip when the waistband is sitting against the screaming joint and feels terrible for the girl. In that moment Lena would do anything to take that pain away and give her best friend just a second of relief. Becoming unfocused on remaining on her feet as Kara tries to fight through the pain she wobbles enough for Lena to have to squeeze her very aggravated ribs.

The most obvious groan leaps into the air unhindered from deep within Kara. She only _just_ catches herself from asking Lena to stop despite knowing very well that the raven haired woman was the only thing keeping her from face planting on the floor of her living room.

"You're hurting more than you told me at first aren't you?" Kara glances away at a suddenly very interesting spot in the corner of the room. Lena can't help but feel just a little bit privileged that Kara has let her hold her for this long, that Kara is leaning fully into her, trusting her completely with her vulnerability. She watches Alex roll her eyes when Kara doesn't say anything and only chews on her lip a little bit embarrassed to have been caught. "Just tell me so I can help you. I'm not mad."

"Ok, yeah. Alex I've never been in so much p-p-pain." She chatters out as the tremors return, ripping at Lena's heart. Kara however has not stopped praying to Rao to just _make it stop. Please. Make it stop._ Since she had been leaning up against that building in Carson City. Those prayers from the back of her mind growing louder and demanding more of her attention with each new onslaught of pain. "The wrap thing isn't really helping."

"I didn't think so. It will help more the longer it's on and when we get you settled. Just tell me how you're feeling, Kara. There's no reason to suffer if we can do something to make it suck a little less, ok? It's not being a wimp or a baby or anything like that. Not even a little bit." Alex gets a silent nod from her sister and she knows that's the best she's going to get for the moment. She does however catch Lena's eye who seems to be concerned with the lack of Kara wanting to feel better. _Me too,_ Alex thinks, _me too._

The two women tag team helping the now very exhausted Kara lay down on the couch. There's no short of groans and cries despite it being obvious how hard Kara was trying to stay quiet.

It somehow works out though and Lena takes the spot under Kara's feet, stacking two pillows provided by Alex on her lap to brace Kara's legs. "Are you comfortable?" The CEO asks as she cautiously rests her arm over the top of Kara's shins, careful not to bump the cast in a way to jar the other throbbing joint.

"Mmmhmmm.." Kara mumbles as sleep threatens to claim her once again. "Lena you don't have to stay. I'm sure you're busy."

"Don't be silly." She squeezes Kara's good calf. "James and Sam have it covered. There is _no_ place I need to be other than right here." She holds her hand up as Kara goes to protest. "I know you don't think you need help or want to accept it. But you do and I'm not going anywhere."

"Lena-"

Alex cuts her off as she returns to the room with an ice pack. "Don't argue. Close your eyes, Kara. It's ok." She slowly gets an edge under Kara and wraps around her waist with Lena's help.

Kara presses her head back into the pillow again at the movement. "Ouch." _A warning would have been nice._

"Sorry, but that should help."

Alex dips back into the kitchen and Kara tries to watch from her spot on the couch without much success. "You heading out? Trading off shifts with the-"

"Hell no. You're stuck with me." Alex cuts in before her sister can even think about finishing that sentence knowing it was going to be something incredibly self deprecating.

"Can't get rid of us that easily."


	5. Chapter 5

**AN - Sorry this chapter is a little bit late. Traveling home for the first time in a year and all the stuff with that happened and this stuff got away from me.**

 **I hope you guys like the chapter. Please let me know what you think.**

 **On an unrelated note... I'm thinking about redoing my AO3 profile and switching over to that. If you have thoughts on the matter please let me know.**

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Kara's senses start to awaken when she hears the her apartment door shutting, however she keeps her eyes shut not yet possessing enough energy to let them flutter open. "Hey," She hears her favorite member of the National City Police Department whisper to her sister. "How's she doing?" Kara can practically see Maggie leaning over the back of Alex's chair to kiss the top of her head or leaning forward, hands on each arm rest to press a quick kiss to her sister's lips.

"Finally fell asleep about an hour ago. She's in a lot of pain but I think she's doing ok." Alex sighs glad to have Maggie there finally. Taking care of Kara like this always hurt her to the point of exhaustion. "Well, as ok as she can be doing."

Kara… _oh Kara,_ that beaming picture of optimism broken and hurting but somehow trying to remain strong for the rest of them. So Alex was strong for her, and before she could handle it well enough on her own. Her and Kara had each other. They had Eliza if things ever got bad enough the sisters' pride would collapse and send them back to Midvale. That was rare though. They fought hard not to need their mother, hell they fought hard not to need each other either. Always the tough ones, these two. At least until they couldn't be any longer.

But now, now Alex had Maggie that she could go to and know she didn't have to be strong or know all of the answers, at least not right now. Not with Kara asleep, not with Lena out cold below her sister's feet, not with anything else to do but try to figure out where to go from here. Because Alex had exactly none of the answers, except for maybe that Kara needed people here even if she insisted otherwise.

"How are _you_ doing?" Kara hears the squeak of Styrofoam and the crinkle of paper, assuming that Maggie had handed Alex her food and a pair of chopsticks. A hiss of air and a click of metal on glass confirms that the two had cracked open their first beers of the night. It warms Kara's heart that Alex had someone to take care of her like Maggie did. Someone who really got her. Someone Alex had no qualms about letting her guard down around. They were perfect for each-other.

"My heart hurts for her and I'm more than a little worried but that's not new. I'm glad she's not hurt any worse. Maggie, it could have been really bad..." Maggie whispers a small agreement as the two continue to talk in hushed voices. Kara thinks that she might hear them mention that _it looks like_ _Little Luther needs this too - yeah, she pushes too much_ but Kara isn't quite sure because sleep is claiming her again before she can even think to protest.

"Babe, she's ok. She's going to be just fine."

The women had been sitting in silence for a while, the youngest half of the group sleeping softly on the couch. Maggie had her feet kicked up over the armrest of the chair Alex was sitting in sipping on a beer, watching her fiance closely. She looked so tense, she had for weeks now, worrying over Kara. " _Seeing her like this is breaking my heart, Maggie."_ And, yeah, for Maggie seeing both Alex's worry and Kara's sorrow was pretty damn upsetting too.

She could read both the Danvers women like books. Well, maybe not books, she didn't exactly read a whole lot for leisure… it wasn't really her style. Maybe it'd be more accurate to say she knew them better than her favorite movie. Which was really saying something. She could quote the Sandlot in entirity. And she knew both sisters better than she knew that cinematic masterpiece. She almost felt bad for the two ever trying to hide stuff from her… almost.

"Is it bad that I'm a little bit glad that she has to slow down for a few days?" Alex sighs heavily into her hands as she leans into them a dry chuckle shaking her shoulders. Maggie rubs small circles on her back getting up from her chair to comfort the eldest Danvers.

"I'm not the best judge because I'm glad too… she needs this." _Hell, we all need this._

"She could have died, Maggie. What if she would have lost her powers when flying or if she would have miss-stepped during that fight?"

Maggie continues to rub small circles on Alex's back, only pausing to tuck a rogue piece of that short red hair behind her ear. "She didn't. She'll learn from this. Be stronger, better for it. She's here, a little beat up, but bones heal."

"Yeah, but what about broken hearts?"

"Those do too, with time." The only thing is… Maggie wasn't sure Kara had a broken heart. The way that the young hero had retreated and tried to seal herself from the ache in her chest… Maggie thought her heart, at least one of the more important pieces of it, was missing and might not ever return. She just hoped, every day, that something might come to fill it again.

And still Kara loved with everything she had. She cared so deeply it washed over her like waves and everyone around her was left to feel the gentle spray as that of the sea crashing onto the sand. It amazed Maggie how much Kara could still love, could still care, could still sacrifice despite everything.

Because Maggie had seen it once when Kara had stood alone looking off into the sky searching for something that would never return. She saw Kara press her hands into her sternum with all her strength. She heard Kara ask her God how something that was missing could hurt so damn much.

Alex wasn't so sure either, about hearts healing, hers still aches when she thought of her father and she knows her mom never really recovered that part that had belonged to him either. She didn't know how to help her baby sister who had already lost so much but they had to try. For Kara's sake, they had to try. But Maggie and Alex both knew they had to do better than just try. "God, Maggie, what are we going to do with her? This is insane… 6 weeks?"

"She's really trying, Al." Maggie had watched the hero fight with her own emotions, turn a blank look into a smile to comfort a child at one of her crime scenes - watched as Kara struggled to find it in her to block blows in a fight. Maggie had even watched her try not to cry even when the tears were hanging over her eyelids and her body was trembling when she struggled through all that guilt. "She's doing the best she can right now."

"I know. I just wish she didn't have too." Alex whispers for the both of them. The agent remembered a time when she had been able to delay this pain for her sister by helping her try to be human… She wondered sometimes if that was a mistake now that she saw how much being human pained Kara. Alex always knew it was just a delay too, they all did. Kara was always going to be a hero… everyone who really knew her knew that. And if it had to be someone… if someone had to bear this burden… as much as it pained her, Alex was so damn proud of her baby sister it often brought tears to her eyes.

Maggie doesn't get to answer as the two women's attention gets pulled back to the couch by a rustle of fabric. They watch with smiles growing on their faces as Lena stretches her arms and wiggles her neck to crack it letting out a yawn. "Ahh, Little Luther nice of you to join us." Maggie greets with a soft smile. _Glad you got some sleep too, kid._ The detective notes how the young CEO had worked her way into her life just as Kara had. She really had too little sisters now and they were both so damn stubborn.

"Shut up." Lena yawns again letting her arms fall down softly back on top of the blanket now covering Kara's legs. She watches her friend closely, brow still furrowed even when she appears to be resting. "She still asleep?"

"It would appear that way…" Maggie quirks an eyebrow and lets out a laugh, careful not to be to loud. Super hearing or no, waking Kara was not really in the cards at the moment.

"Don't be a dick." Alex pushes her girlfriend's feet off the armrest of her chair where Maggie had resumed lounging as she takes another long pull from her beer. "Yeah, she hasn't moved. Out cold I think. I am a little tempted to check her pulse…"

Lena takes Kara's surprisingly small wrist into her hand, her fingers pressing into the soft flesh of her wrist. "Yep, still got one." However instead of letting go Lena adjusts to run a gentle thumb over the skin of Kara's forearm. It's the first time Lena's really ever seen the woman hurt and it is quite jarring, quite tough on the heart.

"Dork." Alex snorts at the young CEO though, she'd be lying if she said she hadn't checked Kara's pulse before when she was sleeping. Alex loved the fact that her sister had someone like Lena in her life. They were close, and of course she had Maggie as well, but it was good for her to have such a close friend she could lean on too.

Maggie calls her out soon after the thought slips through her head with her own small chuckle at her fiance. Alex might be the biggest fucking nerd she knew... which seemed a little bit strange when you pair that with the rest of her personality. "Like you have room to talk."

"Yeah, yeah I'm a dork I know." She brushes off. "Kara's the biggest in the family though. I mean look at her…"

"Shh, Al. I think she's waking up." Maggie drops her legs from their perch on the chair and turns toward Kara. "Hey, Little Danvers."

"Mmm hi." Kara's eyes open for a split second only to shut again at the light. Maggie stands and quickly shuts the blinds in order to save the pounding head from the light. She'd had her share of concussions throughout her career. She got it. "When d' you get here?" The young woman tries to prop herself up on her elbows only to realize that doing so was not exactly the best idea she'd ever had.

"Stay put Kar. If you want to sit up let me help and I'll get some pillows under you." Alex watches her carefully as her face had twisted in pain and she had immediately stopped trying to lean on her elbows to watch Maggie.

"A little over two hours or so ago. You've been knocked out kid." Maggie walks into the kitchen and grabs the pot stickers off the counter. She returns with the box of takeout and two fresh beers for herself and Alex. She puts the pot stickers on Kara's stomach earning a small grunt. "Oh, you're fine." She teases even though she feels a little bad because she knew Kara wasn't the kind to do that for show. And if the light added pressure of a carry out box hurt.. Damn.

Kara takes a bite of her first pot-sticker noticing that they tasted much better heated up with heat vision than in the microwave. Her stomach churns with the familiar taste, she hadn't let herself eat pot-stickers since Mon-El left. He had figured out a homemade recipe that put these to shame… that and comfort food… Kara didn't deserve comfort food. She hands the box over to Maggie after fighting not to gag. "Don't feel good. Not hungry."

"Ok." Maggie mutters and takes the offered food. She was starving. Besides it was clear the hero was not going to be eating much of anything with her head still spinning. Though it doesn't go unnoticed by either of the three woman that it seemed to be for another reason as well.

"So, Lena, I heard you're getting a contract with NCPD for some new gear…" Maggie starts with a mouth full of the blonde's food. Before she can finish the sentence Kara had closed her eyes, being pulled back to sleep and tries to half listen to the idle conversations between the women in her apartment about work, life, and everything in between.

A knock at the door jolts the sleeping Supergirl from her rest. The startled Kara tries to sit up only to find Lena's hand on her arm rubbing it in soothing motions. The blonde pants at the return of pain to her body and the state of alert she had slipped into. "Hey, hey, it's ok. You're safe."

Kara's head resumes spinning and somehow Maggie picks up on it and is at her side in a fraction of a second. She holds the bowl as Kara twists from her spot on the couch throwing what little she did have in her stomach. Kara lays awkwardly twisted to the side for a little bit. Maggie letting her rest her head on her hand. She wipes Kara's forehead with a free hand after Alex takes the bowl. "Easy, kid."

The shaking returns to Kara's body. Her muscles straining against the pain and dizziness. She's cold… she's so cold. And her body hurts.. it hurts so damn bad. Maggie helps her lay back down and wipes her mouth with a wet washcloth, Kara has no idea where that had come from but she was thankful either way. Another knock on the door reminds the group what had disrupted their gentle environment. Kara's head snaps in the direction of the door. "Easy, Little Danvers. We've got you."

It freaked Kara out a little bit not being able to look through the door to see who it was, or hear the heartbeats of those around her. No one ever knocked on her door and was a surprise. However the more pressing issue was that of trying not to throw up again. Throwing up sucked anyway but with the broken ribs it really wasn't appreciated. Lena had grabbed a hold of her legs trying to hold her from falling sideways off the couch. She lets go with one arm to check her buzzing phone.

 **Sam:** At the door. Everything ok?

"I got it." Lena answers as Kara tries to sit up again, apparently a glutton for punishment, when she notices Lena's hesitation to move her legs from where they rest. She had had finally stopped quivering, for a second prior to the commotion and she knows moving her legs was about to really suck. She didn't want to hold Lena hostage for however long it took for her nerves to calm down. "It's Sam, dropping off some stuff."

Alex holds a hand up at both the younger women halting her sister from moving and the youngest Luther from having to pull herself away. "I've got it. You two relax." Alex opens the door to their new friend who'd grown close with her sister in the recent months. Well as close as anyone could get to Kara right now, which wasn't exactly much but Kara cared about Sam and her daughter enough to spend time with them and that was saying something especially with how she'd been in the past months. "Hey, Lena said you brought some stuff over?"

"Yeah." Sam holds up a couple of bags. "Lena said our little reporter could use some company and she could use some dinner and maybe some actual clothes. What happened?"

"That's not important right now." Alex scrubs her hand over her face as she steps aside to let the women in. Exhaustion had finally hit the eldest Danvers and her stress pops through a little more obvious at Sam's soft smile. "She's ok. They are in a cell. I think she just needs people here."

"Say no more." The CFO steps in dropping some food on the counter. She knew the bunch would tease her for bringing so much over but she was a mom, mothering is what she does. Besides the lack of sustenance in Kara's apartment usually, full with her favorite snacks, really concerned all of them - even Sam who hadn't known her _before_.

"Hey," Kara rasps out with a yawn and watches as Sam takes her in. Fresh ice pack on her hip, dark circles below her eyes, casted leg, shaking just a little, taking shallow breaths. "You should see the other guy."

The joke serves its purpose and the look of immense worry melts from Sam's face and it earns a huff of annoyance from the other woman in the room. "I'm glad you're ok." Sam smiles at the blonde as she lets a hand linger on Kara's forehead, a comfort mechanism she had picked up with Ruby.

"Yeah, I'm ok." However Kara means it in a completely different way allowing Sam's suggestion of her okayness to carry over further than everyone knew it should. Sam was commenting on her still being here. Not being in a hospital right now or worse, nothing more... but to Kara the push was worth a shot. She had been doing it for so long now even when she wanted to admit she wasn't she still fell into the habit of pretending she was.

"See, Kara, this is when you admit that you're not and just let your friends take care of you." Sam teases as she runs her hand over to the side of her young friend's cheek. She only receives an eye-role and a bashful smile in return.

"You should listen to your friends more often, kid. They seem like they know what they're talking about."

"You just like it because they agree with you and Alex." Kara sticks her tongue out at her newest sister.

"That's a perfectly good reason." The CFO jokes before disappearing for a second before she is back and handing Lena a salad and a glass of wine before making herself comfortable in Alex's chair. The eldest sister had yet to return from the kitchen. "I did bring a few colored sharpies, want some autographs?"

"Sure, yeah, go ahead." Kara drops her head back to the pillow and hard at her eyes. A yawn escapes her mouth and Kara really can't find the energy to even act like she is excited by the prospect. Kara was fading, and fading very quickly. Both her consciousness and her ability to act ok. She knew they were trying to make her feel better but she didn't want to feel better. That, however, did not mean that her friends weren't excited to sign the hero's cast and regress a little bit to their more juvenile years.

As if to prove Kara's inner dialog right Lena holds her hands up to receive one of the aforementioned markers. The CEO promptly misses the catch with about the most unathletic show of an attempt, like ever. Kara smiles at the soft curses Lena mutters when the offending marker lands in her salad. "Great catch. A plus plus." Sam shakes her head as she sips on her wine.

"Nice hands, feet." Maggie snorts from her chair uncurling her legs from her chest to make room for Alex when she comes back from the kitchen. Kara can't help but wonder where her sister had disappeared too, she only suspects that it's something not so good for her.

Lena sticks her tongue out at the room, no one mentioning that Kara hadn't jumped in on the teasing and hadn't so much as cracked more than half a smile. "Yeah, yeah, these hands are insured for a lot of money, just remember that." She deadpans as she starts to sign Kara's cast near where her toes are free. Lena makes a note to offer to paint them for her tomorrow when the pain calmed down a little bit. They look so red and angry and swollen.

"Luther's got good hands, huh? Good to know." Alex jests as she slumps into the recliner with Maggie handing her a fresh glass of wine. Maggie's free arm looping naturally around her sister's stomach as she rests her chin on Alex's shoulder. _They really do fit together perfectly_ , Kara can't help but think.

"She has terrible hands. They were teasing her because she can't catch." Kara grumbles looking over at her sister not understanding why it was so funny. Her tone of voice practically screaming _duh, catch up Alex._

However that only spurs the group on. Sam snorts at the missed innuendo by the innocent blonde. Kara turns beat red when she realizes Alex's intention. It really was too easy to get her flustered. Lena rolls her eyes so hard Maggie is worried they might roll away. And Maggie, ever the adult smacks Alex lightly in the chest with the back of her hand and mutters "behave."

"So… Sam, how long can you stay?" Lena quickly changes the topic tossing the marker back to her oldest friend as she walks over to sign the plaster as well. Kara only relaxes as much as she can into the couch fighting the sleep trying to claim her yet again. Though it is dreamless now she knows it won't be soon. And she really really doesn't want that to be when everyone is still here. That would be too much. They had seen enough of her vulnerability already.

Sam makes quick work of a loopy signature near the top of Kara's cast. The blonde still just watching her friends interact with a clenched jaw as she tries to keep herself from quivering in the sheer amount of pain she is in. This was really nice to have them here but she was still in a lot of pain and didn't want to worry them too much. She was just glad that they were distracted enough with each other they hadn't called her out yet for not saying anything. "Ruby is at a friends house so I can stay a bit."

"Look at that, Little Danvers, now you have the signatures of two of the more powerful women in the city… you could make a lot of money… forge a lot of checks." Maggie winks at her trying to lighten the mood.

Alex returns the backhanded slap to the chest, "Who's not behaving now?" is whispered between the two but everyone hears them.

Lena and Sam find it way too funny and Kara's not sure what's going on. They hadn't hardly had a few sips of wine. It wasn't late enough for them to be delirious yet. _They're trying to make you laugh, stupid._

Kara tries to ignore the pull of unfamiliar soreness and leftover pain from the fight as she moves to scrub her hand over her face reminiscent of how her sister had when she had opened the door for Sam not too long ago. She appreciates them trying to make her feel better, she really does but she doesn't want to feel better. Not only that but she doesn't know how to feel better. Her body is screaming at her, her heart still aches, she feels sick, and her mind is so incredibly foggy. Being in her apartment without Mon-El still sucks but it sucks a lot less with them around and she doesn't quite know how to feel about that. "You guys don't have to do this."

"Do what?" Alex cocks her head to the side to consider her little sister's words. Though Alex is not fully tracking on the question the others in the room are.

 _Don't play dumb, Alex, it's beneath you._ "Stay, take care of me… keep me company. I'm ok."

Alex huffs sarcastically and takes a long drink of her beer. _Says you._

Lena smiles softly at her and pats her leg. _Kara, darling, you're not._

Sam takes a sip of wine and looks at her skeptically over the rim of the glass. _Sure Jan._

Maggie only elbows Alex but watches the younger Danvers carefully giving her a sympathetic smile. _Sorry, kid, no one's buying that._

"Really. You guys I'm boring and you have more important things to worry about then who's going to babysit the broken Kryptonian."

Alex's eyes go wide. Kara hadn't told Sam yet, they'd really only just become friends. This was so not good. Sam's eyes widen too for a second in surprise before Lena just gives her a small nod. "Kara you're not-"

Kara jumps in before Alex can finish her sentence, none the wiser for the secret she had just let slip. "Broken? Haha yeah, I'm literally laid up with a broken ankle and ribs and a dislocated hip _and_ a concussion. That counts as pretty broken by most human standards I think." They all carefully consider her as she smiles too proud to admit that she's broken in every other way too. Every single other way possible it felt like. Well, maybe not broken, but certainly breaking.

 _I was going to say Kryptonian…. Well I guess that cat is out of the bag._ Alex sighs and looks a Maggie carefully who just shrugs... Not much they can do about it now. Besides Maggie is pretty sure Kara didn't even realize what she'd just let slip. She seemed to be fading pretty fast after trying to smile through the visitor's jokes at first. Maggie had noticed it happening a few minutes ago. The smile disappearing being traded for a grimace. Her easy voice being taken over with a strain that only came with trying not to yell out in pain. Her bright blue eyes growing a little glassy as her eyelids start feeling heavy again. Kara fights it just as she really wants to fight the fact that her head is _still_ spinning.

"How you feeling there, Superstar?" Maggie questions, calling the attention in the room to the struggling girl on the couch. she couldn't tell if the other women hadn't noticed yet or if they were pretending for the sake of Kara's comfort. To be perfectly honest it wasn't as if Kara had even been all that convincing since waking up. Her pain was so-so obvious. "Still dizzy?"

"Yeah." She admits letting her eyes remain closed just a little bit too long as she blinked. She turns her head on the pillow to make eye contact with Alex who regards her with a sympathetic smile. "Why didn't you tell me concussions sucked so bad?"

"I've only had the one and it was minor." She shakes her head in attempt to deflect. Knowing Kara knows she's had more but seriously wanting to avoid a conversation with Maggie about her being a ' _dumbass with a death wish who doesn't take good enough care of her precious genius brain_.' Needless to say that particular habit of hers had caused more than a few hard conversations bordering a little to close on arguments for Alex's liking.

Maggie puts her glass down on the coffee table rolling her eyes, completely on to Alex's bullshit. "I know for a fact you've had more, Alex, but that's a conversation for a different day." This time it's Lana and Sam laughing at the oh-so-busted women now sinking away from her fiance in the aftermath of a light scolding. Maggie rolls her eyes - _damn Danvers women, fucking children._ "Close your eyes Little Danvers, it'll help." Kara relents, much to everyone's surprise, to Maggie's advice. She doesn't catch the shocked look Alex shoots Maggie asking _what the hell just happened? She listened? To you?_ Or the response of her sister's fiance of a shrug and a wink _get used to it Danvers._

"Can't say I've ever had one." Lena brags taking another sip of wine just after she pours herself another glass. She really doesn't know why she interjects. It's silly but their voices seemed to be calming to Kara earlier as her breathing seemed easier during her _brief_ nap. She just wanted to help Kara get back to that. It had been so long, to long, since she had seen the blonde that comfortable. And with these circumstances... that was more than concerning. Lena was down right terrified for her friend. She hated to see her hurt so bad.

Kara keeps her eyes shut and mumbles "Liar, you had to have with how many times you hit your head. You just don't go to the medics." That earns a small chuckle from the women in the room. Kara, ever the puppy, was perfectly adorable when she was tired and mumbling, fighting sleep until it claimed her without her consent.

She always had fought sleep, Alex remembers, even when they were kids she'd fight drooping eyelids as hard as she could, determined not to miss out. At least that's what Alex had thought it was at first, and at some points it was. However, it was much more often that Kara didn't want to find what was waiting in her dreams. Reality was either much better or much worse than what her unconscious mind would drum up and the young alien didn't quite know how to handle that.

"Well she's not wrong." Alex chimes in, knowing just how many times Lena had refused to get checked by a DEO medic, or even herself. "Hows Ruby doing?"

"Oh she's great. As much of a handful as ever. To be honest tonight is a good break just wished it was under better circumstances." She casts a worried look at the blonde, whose eyes are still closed.

"Mmm I told you guys. I'm fine."

"Whatever you say, Kara." Alex chuckles despite the greenish color returning to her sister's cheeks. God, Kara really had gotten the shit beat out of her today… Alex is just kind of glad that between the four intruders in her sister's apartment and the pain from the day's events Kara seems to be a little bit distracted from the thoughts of her burdens and her lost love that had been consuming her every second since she ended the Daxamite invasion. She knew it would return soon enough and when that happened Kara would likely only want one one or two people around but for now, this was good. She had a feeling it was the first time Kara hadn't felt completely alone in months.

Kara listens to the easy conversation of the women around her not hearing too many of their words. Letting her exhaustion claim her once again. Those in the room knew that as much as Kara had slept this afternoon she needs about another two weeks of this. Even if her powers come back and she heals from her wounds she needs to sleep. She needs to rest. She needs to deal with some of this stuff she's been holding on to… but that's for another day.

"Looks like we bored her to sleep, Ladies." Lena laughs as she resumes running her thumb over the material of Kara's sweats. Her glass of wine resting on her cast.

"Mmm… 'm awake." She grumbles with her eyes still closed. Kara really was still awake. She was enjoying listening to the soft voices of her friends… nae, family… filling the room as she rested. _I can rest without sleeping, dummies._ She also didn't want to be the sleepy hurt one anymore. It sucked. Most of all it felt burdensome.

Alex chuckles at her sister and Kara can hear the fabric of the chair as she probably was starting to stand up. "Mags, help me carry her to the bed."

Kara jumps awake and groaning at the sudden movement. Her eyes shooting open to find Alex's brown ones searching and way too reminiscent to panic for Alex's liking. "NO!... no. I'm good here."

Alex kneels down by the couch and check's Kara's forehead for a fever. Kara really didn't get that, she was hurt not sick. Though the touches on her forehead are actually really comforting despite her pounding head. Not addressing the panic she tries to calm her sister before it can go any further. "Kara, come on you'll sleep better. You're hardly awake."

"I'm good here. Please don't move me. My hip has finally calmed down a little bit. Please."

"How about you try that again and this time you tell me what's actually going on."

"I… I can't... I can't sleep in there without him. Please don't make me sleep in there without him." She blurts out much to her dismay. And just like that the truth was out and each of her visitors hearts broke at the whispered confession. Kara feels the concern of her go deeper but chances her jaw to fight off anymore from escaping. When they didn't come Lena eyes the tear sitting in her eyelashes in hopes that everyone else will too. Lena stops rubbing Kara's good calf and gently grabs her hand.

"Shhh, sh, sh, Kar. We'll stay right here. It's ok. We won't move you." Alex kisses her forehead and returns to her seat with Maggie who just wraps her arms tight around the heartbroken older sister. She whispers _it'll be ok_ in her ear this time quiet enough that no one else hears her.

"And we'll all stay until you're asleep. Ok?" Lena speaks softly taking a hold of her hand wishing to everything she could lean up to reach out and brush that stray golden curl back behind Kara's ear. To let her hand linger on her best friend's cheek, to brush those tears trapped in her eyelids away with her thumb "We're not going to leave you. I _promise_. I'm here. We're all here."

"No, it's ok, its ok. You guys can go." Kara turns her head sideways again finding something really interesting in the screen of the blank television. Lena couldn't see it but Sam could watch as one of those tears fell lose from those long eyelashes with the extra pull of gravity. She hadn't meant to cry, that emotion was long past but still the tear had lingered. Pathetic wasn't something Sam would ever associate with the younger blonde woman but this increased state of vulnerability was jarring to witness.

"Not a shot Little Danvers." Maggie places a kiss on Alex's cheek as she sits back down. "You've been there for each of us when we needed someone. Even when we tried to push you away. I know I did and you stood there stronger for it. I'm sure you've done it fore these girls as well. It's only time we got to return the favor, kid. You've been everyone else's shoulder, let us be yours. _Let_ us be here for you."

"You may not care to admit it but you're hurt and still dealing with.. A lot of stuff. We're not just going to leave you here alone to try to do stuff or to get lost in your thoughts. That's not happening." Alex interjects. Kara just wishes they'd all stop looking at her with those soft sad smiles. She knew her protests were basically weak attempts to maintain some dignity but these guys were making it really hard to keep pretending. She didn't know they had noticed or that they had cared so much. She really didn't. Part of her didn't want them too but the other part was so happy that someone cared enough to stick around. "Believe me, I know that's probably what you want, at least a little, to punish yourself. I don't think anyone in this room would be strong enough to hold it together any longer then 20 seconds after being alone. Nor does anyone want to see that happen. So we're going to be here. You're not alone, Kara. Not ever. So if you break down we're going to be here to hold you."

"If you need to cry, you go right on ahead. There will be no judgement here." Sam scoots forward on her chair to look more closely at the blonde reaching out to rub her thumb over Kara's cheek. This shouldn't remind her so much of when she has comforted Ruby. It shouldn't but all Sam can see is a broken girl trying so hard, _so hard_ , to be strong. And Kara knows it's true, that they'd be here and hold no judgment for her if she'd cry... but if she starts crying now she will never stop.

Also there's the whole thing about her head pounding and crying had always given her a massive headache.

Kara nods though, this was more comfort than she'd ever deserve. _Thank you._ "I really don't know what I did to deserve you guys," and this time when her voice is raw with emotion it's for an entirely different reason.

Alex pulls a chair closer to the couch so she can run her hands softly through Kara's hair massaging her scalp to help lull the hero to sleep. "I think the same thing about you. Every day, sis." Maggie hands her one of the blankets from the corner of the room everyone knows is Kara's favorite and Alex drapes it over her sister's legs. "Just you being here is more than enough. Close your eyes Kar. You're ok." _We've got you._

Kara has been asleep for a while when she twitches and catches the group's attention with whimpers and tears dampening her cheeks. She quiets when Lena grabs her hand continues to run her other hand over Kara's good leg. Sam leaves eventually to return to her house and pick up Ruby.

After Kara has gone back to sleep, sleep without the twitches and tears, Alex asks Lena if she's good where she is. It had been hours, they'd spent on that couch, in that spot. The CEO hadn't gotten to change and her legs were starting to fall asleep but she honestly didn't care. Not even a little bit. She was comfortable enough, besides she really didn't want to even think about trying to move Kara's legs. Lena smiles with sadness in her eyes, "Yeah, I've got her. We're good right here." Alex kisses her little sister on the forehead and turns back to Maggie, pulling her sleepy fiance out of the chair. The two walk back to Kara's room quietly speaking to each other before falling asleep in Kara's bed. Leaving Lena to continue to hold Kara's hand as she herself drifted off to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN -**

 **Sup guys! Sorry for the delay I was out of the country and didn't take any technology with me. Just need to get away from it all for a min sometimes.**

 **Anyway... here is the new chapter. I hope ya'll like it. Let me know!**

* * *

As the smell of food pulls Kara from her deep sleep she groans as the discomfort settles in to her entire body. Noticing her change in breathing before Kara had actually woken up Alex is on her way over with pills, that she, should have been more diligent about making her sister take the day prior, and a fresh glass of water in hand. She had been distracted is all. Kara took some at the DEO and Alex really didn't want to wake her up once she had finally let herself drift off into some sleep. "Morning Sunshine. Pancakes and coffee?"

Kara goes to answer "no" but her stomach grumbles and pretty much tells her older sister the oposite. Not having near enough energy or will to argue about her self-neglect recently Kara decides to let it happen.

Besides. Alex never made pancakes anymore and they were straight up the most delicious thing Kara had ever had. Her sister would make them in the mornings sometimes in the summer seeing as it was the first thing Alex had learned to cook. Jeremiah had taught her though… so there was that. "Did you really sleep here last night? You guys didn't…"

"Of course we stayed. You and me are having a sister day today. No work. No worries. Just us. Some food and some bonding. Depending on how you're feeling I _might_ let you watch a movie. J'ohn gave me a couple of days off." Kara wasn't really buying that at all though. No way Alex would take a day off if offered. Not even for Kara. She'd figure out a way to do both. So Kara looks at her with all those accusations and the annoyed thought of _Great more babysitting_ bouncing around in her head _._ She hated that even after all these years Alex still had to take care of her broken emotional ass. She really did.

"I can be alone, Alex. It's ok." _You leave I break down. Probably the sooner the better. Might as well get it over with._ She hates herself a little for how unconvincing that sounded, even to her. She meant it though… or at least she thought she did. Kara had felt so alone and isolated that last few months being around people again was nice, she had to admit she felt normal again last night, but as good as it had felt she also felt weird. Like she had to learn to let people in all over again.

"Ok, J'ohn may or may not have ordered me to take some of my days off." Alex smiles at her as she sits in the chair pulled much closer to the couch than Kara had remembered it. It was close enough her sister could reach out and check her forehead for a fever again.

 _Dude Alex. I'm hurt. Not sick. Chill._

But even though Alex is a trained liar and manipulator for some reason Kara believes her. Kara knew her being all caught up in herself had been tough on her sister. She knew that and it was just one more thing that tore at her insides. She just didn't know what else she could do to keep functioning the way everyone needed her too.

"Fine. What's in your hand?"

"Pain meds. I know you hate them but they'll help. Take 'em now and I'll get you food in like five minutes." As much as she does hate the medication Kara is really not digging the throbbing of her actual entire body nor the very _very_ sharp sensation shooting through her hip. She relents with a nod and Alex helps her sit up with a steadying hand at her back.

God… the way her sore abs and torso pulled at her very much broken ribs… Pretty much it wasn't so much Alex helping her sit up but Alex actually sitting her up. It really hurt. Like bad.

Knowing her sister's pain a little too well from her career at the DEO Alex whispers soft encouragement as she gets Kara up and propped on the pillows. Kara hated how much effort it took even just to let Alex basically move her. How much her head spun. How her body screamed at her to let her know just how stupid moving was right now. _I know._ She wanted to yell back. _I know just cut me some slack. Please._ Her second thought was something more along the lines of how she must actually have a pretty bad concussion to actually be considering talking to her body.

The hero closes her eyes and groans to herself trying to will the pain away, figuring that might work a little better than her initial plan, without much avail. "Easy Kara. These will help." A water bottle and some pills find their way into Kara's hand. Kara didn't remember closing her eyes again or leaning her head against the back of the couch but coming back to reality was less fun than she would have hoped. The apartment felt too bright, though she usually liked how sunny it was in the mornings. Her head felt to heavy and spinny to stay put on her exhausted neck. It was all bad.

Again from her experience and knowing how just how sore Kara had to be Alex takes the water bottle back. She watches as her little sister labours to bring her hand with the pills to her mouth and grimises at the bitter taste they leave on the tongue. She puts the bottle to Kara's lips and helps her drink. "That should help. Stay put. I'll be right back."

 _It's not exactly like I can go anywhere Alex but sure yeah I'll stay put._ She rolls her eyes at her sister immediately regretting that decision as the head-spinning intensifies. It kinda feels like she's doing summersaults though she knows for certain she is planted firmly on the couch. "Thanks. You really don't have to spend your day off with me. I know I've been awful lately."

A deep sigh cuts through Kara's living room as Alex gently leans her sister up before sitting down where Kara's upper half was resting to let Kara lean back into her. Abandon the quest for food, which will come soon enough, Alex takes the time to hold her little sister. "I need a break too, and I miss you. It's not only about you, ya know." Alex jokes and moves a piece of stray hair behind her sister's ear. Alex really didn't even want to address the words spilling from her sisters mouth. As far as she was concerned there was nothing that could happen today that could take her away from Kara's side.

She didn't need too though. Kara knew. And for once she relaxed into Alex and allowed herself to be held for the first time since she sent him away. Oddly it didn't hurt like she thought it would. Alex's arms felt different and she just.. she just… well Kara doesn't know what she did but she let Alex hold her.

She never wanted to leave her sisters arms again. As she relaxed into Alex, though their position was a little awkward at first something had washed over her and she didn't hurt so bad. Maybe all those months had left her starved for touch… and maybe Alex's arms were more healing than those damn sun lamps at the DEO ever would be.

Kara forgot about her stomach's demands for sustenance as she closed her eyes. She forgot that there was at least one other individual in the apartment and just focused on being with her sister again... That is until Lena brings over a plate of pancakes. Chocolate chip pancakes with Nutella and peanut butter spread over top of them to be exact. _Screw syrup.. This is the way to go._

The CEO hands the steaming plate to Alex who somehow manages not to move too much in order to keep Kara where she had grown relaxed. "Thank you, Lena." Kara takes the plate from Alex and finds her eyes fluttering shut, for an entirely different reason, as she lets the amazingness that is her sister's pancakes wash over her taste buds.

"How are you feeling?" Lena asks through an amused smirk. This was much closer to the Kara she had grown to care so much about. Relishing food like she'd never eat again. Taking comfort from her sister. Relaxed in her apartment. It was really nice to see, if she was being honest, even under these circumstances.

"A lot better." The reporter answers through a mouthful of the pancakes.

"Liar." Alex caughes behind her sister in a faux attempt to be subtle. Kara winces but is quickly answered with a soft sorry. The older sister regretting the jarring movement however small it was and how ever much Kara had deserved to be called out for being a dumbass. Alex just really hoped the drugs kicked in soon.

"Crinkle?"

"Yep." Alex shakes her head though because holy shit Kara was punch drunk… still… which was concerning… but Alex was behind her. No way could she see if Kara had her trademark crinkle or not.

"Dang it." Kara pouts as she puts another bite of food into her mouth. Actually believing Alex could see her. It's almost like when Kara first came to live with them and Alex convinced her that every time she lied a little red dot appeared on her forehead. So one time Kara walked her gullible ass up to her sister with her hand over her forehead. Alex had wished she had better self control because she had burst out laughing and ruined the trick before she could really reap the benefits of her debauchery. She's called back from the happy memory though when Kara continues to mumble "Everything hurts."

Taking pity on her sister she kisses the back of her head "Those meds should help soon. I'm sorry we didn't get more in you last night, that's my fault."

"It's ok." Kara leans her head back into Alex, suddenly feeling much more tired than she had just moments prior. Apparently soon was now. Kara didn't know how she felt about the drugs though. She hated how out of it she felt and they really didn't do much to help with the spinning or the not so pleasant feeling in her stomach.

The two Danvers had once again forgotten they weren't the only two in the room. However, Lena can only smile as as she watches the two sisters on the couch. She can't help but be a little bit jealous that they had each other growing up. It makes her miss Lex a little but then she also considers how Kara has adopted her into her own little family and that one is so much better. Taking a moment to take it in Lena talks herself into breaking the moment. "I've got to get to work. Alex, text me if you guys need anything." Without knowing what came over her she brushes a hand back over Kara's forehead to the top of her hair and places a small kiss here "Get some rest."

"Thanks, Lena." Alex answers for the both of them. Kara lost somewhere in concussion land or pain med land… or maybe… Lena Luthor just kissed my head land… Once the other young woman is out the door Alex pulls her sister back to the real world. "Kar, you done with the food?"

"Yeah, sorry."

"Its ok. I'll just leave it on the table here incase you want more in a little bit."

"I feel like such a wimp." Alex has to focus on not flinching when Kara's thick skull knocks into her chin as her sister drops her head back trying to rest it on something. Apparently Alex's head was the closest thing. The older sister wished to hell she could get over the worry and just laugh, just a little, at her sister and how soft she truly was right now. Such a stark contrast to the Kara that had been running around for the last six months.

"No, not even close. You took a beating. You're going to be hurting pretty bad for a few days. That's ok, Kara, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being hurt. You're allowed to be in pain." Alex hoped her sister had enough wits about her to realize she wasn't just talking about physical pain or the alien from yesterday kicking the shit out of her.. Life hadn't been kind to her sister either. "And despite getting your ass kicked a little bit you took that thing out without powers. I'm impressed, proud, a little angry you put yourself in that situation, but so so proud. You, Kara Danvers are a badass."

"Must run in the family." Maggie comes from the bathroom spinning her wet hair in a towel. Signature head tilt and dimples brightening the room. At least Alex swore it did. Kara still wasn't paying much attention to anything but the backs of her eyelids. "Morning." She kisses the top of Alex's head and steals a pancake from Kara's plate without protest from the blonde. As much as it was nice not to have to fight over food, Alex really was looking forward to the day when Kara would be protective AF over whatever was on her plate. This whole "no appetite" thing was very unsettling. "I've gotta get down to the precinct. Let me know what you guys want for lunch."

"Bye Babe, be safe." The eldest danvers leans into another kiss this time to the lips as she uttered their habitual farewell. It had started out of nowhere. Alex doesn't really remember the first time they told each other that. Probably some crisis or another. It was really hard to tell. But she was super glad that it was something they had kept saying. Always a reminder not to be a complete and utter reckless idiot for no reason. God knew Alex needed it.

Maggie figured she'd better get away with kissing Alex that close to Kara while she could… the blonde was rather pre-occupied at the moment. The woman was a little amused but mostly just concerned… Kara was fucking out of it. Like total space cadet, not even close to orbit, all the way out of it. "Love you."

Alex smiles over her sisters shoulder as she shifts just a little bit. Kara really was pretty bony and hard in spots that often pressed into her uncomfortably. "You too." She really did love Maggie though. _That woman… damn_ … Alex just hoped she'd be safe. It was obviously a valid concern for the both of them to think about often. It made it easier in a way though that it was mutual.

"Bye, Maggie." Kara hums as she floats back into the room from wherever the hell her mind had taken her. She was also a big, big, fan of the detective. Not so much of all the PDA but hey Alex was happy and that was the thing she seemed to care most about.

"See you Little Danvers. Keep her out of trouble for me."

"Mmm, Yep." Another half present hum pulls small chuckles from Maggie as she steps out the door shaking her head. _Space. Cadet._ Once the door closes behind Maggie the apartment falls a little bit to silent for Kara. She could hear her heart beat in her head, almost feel the blood in her ears, not exactly something she enjoyed. "Mmm, sorry yerr stuck with me today."

"I want to be here, Kara." The older sister sighs and allows Kara to sink a little bit further into her. Bony shoulders and all. "I'm sorry you're not feeling well. I'll get you more medication in a couple of hours ok?"

Kara's head lolls to the side to find a little more of a comfortable spot against her sister's shoulder this time avoiding a hard clash with Alex's chin. "I'm so tired, Alex." The exhaustion seems to sink deep into her bones, anchoring her to where she was. Kara didn't know if she could move if she tried. Her eyelids felt so heavy it was hard to keep them open. That, compounded by the need for them to be shut as to relieve some of the pressure that seemed to be building up in her head again.

"Close your eyes," Alex mutters against the side of her head, "I'll be right here." The eldest sister knows pretty close to how Kara feels. She'd had her fair share of concussions and she'd been beat all to hell once or twice. Though not all at once. She just wished there was something she could do to make Kara feel even a little bit better.

"Tired, not sleepy." The blonde protests as she shifts yet again against her sister. A slightly clammy hand working its way into Alex's to let her run gentle circles over the backs of Kara's bruised knuckles. It's kinda funny, Alex hadn't even noticed the deep purple on the hero's knuckles till just then having been preoccupied with the more pressing injuries. But by the looks of it it those knuckles could probably use an x-ray, or at the very least a good soak rotation in warm and ice water.

"You can't even keep your eyes open, Kara, and you keep doing touch and go's against my shoulder. I know you have to be exhausted."

Kara relents to her older sister as she calls her out. As she surrenders to Alex's observations her bones seem to grow even heavier against the gentle rise and fall of Alex's chest. "I'm so worn out and I don't know what to do anymore. I want to be ok. I am trying _so hard_ to be ok. I promise I am Alex." Kara seems to fall back to earth rather quickly. The re-entry rivaling that of Apollo 13's if Alex remembered the space shuttle crashing into the ocean correctly. Alex doesn't have to be able to see her face to know that Kara is probably very close to tears. Though those tears are not so much being upset but out of pure exhaustion and frustration at her current situation.

"Quit trying." The agent reaches around Kara to adjust her shoulder enough so her entire arm doesn't fall asleep on her. It wouldn't be the first time Kara had caused that to happen but she's pretty sure she needs full function of her arm if Kara were to need to get up and use the bathroom or something. With the new position Alex takes the opportunity to run a hand up and down Kara's arm.

Alex never was a fan of that. Her skin always felt a little too sensitive or raw for constant rubbing, she liked just being held in one spot better, not Kara though. Just like the puppy she was, she loved (or so it seemed) to basically be petted.

"Excuse me?" Kara stiffins, slightly offended. Who the hell was this, telling her to quit? It certainly wasn't Alex Danvers. Alex had never quit anything in her life, including her extremely healthy coping mechanism that wasn't anything that could possibly resemble alcoholism at all. Kara almost rolls her eyes at the thought. _Yeah, right._

"Stop trying to be ok and making sure everyone else is ok for five seconds and let yourself feel something." _Pot meet kettle…_ Kara really wants to call Alex out on her hypocrisy because she does the same damn thing. Well maybe not lately that she'd found Maggie and maybe not with all the stuff Kara had been dealing with but Alex was far from baggage-less and even farther from having a healthy coping mechanism.

Alex watches Kara struggle, knowing her smart ass of a little sister was debating calling her out or not. Alex knew damn well she was guilty of the same thing to a degree but Kara had taken it to a whole nother level. Like _NOT SLEEPING FOR 6 WHOLE WEEKS._ Alex waited for a response for a second. Her hand shifting down to rest against Kara's bruised torso just over the warn cotton shirt. _Come on, Kar. Talk to me._

"I can't." The kryptonian takes a deeper breath than she had been allowing herself. Though it's not without a little bit of consequence from her ribs the extra oxygen gave her just enough control to not completely break right then and there. Alex sensed that too… because of course she did.

"Sure you can. You just don't want to. I'll ask again, what is it that you're so afraid of?" Alex turns just slightly to watch her sister's face. As good as she had gotten over the years of being supergirl of schooling her emotions she still pretty much sucked at it when it came to Alex. Especially when she was hardly "there" enough to be conscious at the moment. Alex felt a little guilty for taking advantage of her sister's diminished state to get some answers but she really didn't have any other choice did she? _I mean it's either this or letting Kara completely lose it on her own._

Kara takes a moment, as deep of a breath she can manage as she tries to sigh, if it wasn't so pain filled Alex would have kinda thought it was cute. Another moment passes as the older sister thinks, _any day now Kar. Come on… talk to me. I'm here._ "I'm afraid if I let myself feel it, it will be real! He'll be dead and never come back and the pain will never stop. If I do what you're telling me… I just can't Alex. No. I can't." _I will lose everything all over again and I don't know how much more I can take. I don't know if I can survive that. Not again._

And of course Alex picks up on all Kara had left unsaid. It was damn near her job at this point. It always broke her inside to see that expression Kara would look at her with when she was in the most pain. That sad look where her eyes got so blue and so big Alex could nearly see her heart shattering over and over again in slow motion like it was one of those James Bond movie openings or something. The one where she looked up at Alex through tear dampened eyelashes, regardless if she'd actually let any fall or not. The one where her mouth was in just a _little_ pout. The one where she slouched her shoulders and ducked her head just enough. This look that was so often at Alex when they sat across the table from one another, or where Kara would be leaning with both elbows on the little island in her kitchen while Alex stood on the other side just watching her little alien as she grew quiet after what was oftentimes a long winded ramble about something Kara had been bottling up.

It was with this look that she pleaded with Alex to tell her what to do. This look that trusted Alex implicitly. The look that even though Kara felt so lost and so _sad_ and could nearly feel her soul leaving her body, that knew Alex could fix anything. And most the time she could…. Just this time the older sister was at a complete loss.

Because she didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to do to make it better. She had no idea what it was Kara was feeling. Alex knew she could have. She damn near did. But as much as Kara felt like she'd hesitated to press that button Alex had hesitated to push hers more. She had the chance to end the invasion with that gun. She had the orders to fire. She did. But she did it too late. She waited too long.

She didn't know for sure if Kara was even on the ship or not. She did know that two of the people Kara cared about most in the world were. Her best friend and her boyfriend. Who Alex could see was rapidly becoming more than that to Kara. She knew that losing those two would devastate her sister. Hell, she even cared about her sisters friends. They'd become part of the family. But losing Kara would have… it would have been bad. Even though, like Mon-El, Kara had given her permission. But when she pressed the button the gun was gone and she'd taken away their best option because she was insubordinate and she'd hesitated.

When she thought about Kara's words in the months after the invasion about if it would have been Maggie… how if it had Alex would be a mess and damn near drinking herself to death… Alex thought her sister was right. She hesitated when it had been Kara's best friend and boyfriend. She certainly would have if it'd been Maggie. Part of her argued that it would have been easier in the moment if it had been Maggie but she calls BS on herself before she can even finish that thought. And because of her hesitation Kara had to fight to the death with the mother of her boyfriend and if that wasn't enough, in the end, Kara had to press her own button. One that sent her boyfriend away, and even though Alex would never tell Kara this, had likely killed him. Kara had to do that. Kara had the strength and composure to do that. Alex hadn't.

But instead of all that she just looks down at that _look_ like she had many times before and she tries to return it just as she always had. With her own look that told Kara that everything would be ok. That "big sister knows best" and "big sister has it" look.

Kara has to look away and Alex just holds her. "I'm worried about you. Eventually you won't be able to keep pushing, and that's going to make things so much harder." _Which is right fucking now actually._ "You can't just go numb to everything Kara. That's not how it works."

"I feel so stupid. He was my _boyfriend_ , we were only together for a little bit and I feel like it broke me to lose him. It doesn't make sense. It was easy to be kind and happy after I lost everything. My family, my planet, Jeremiah, Cat in a way, my purpose, Kal..Ok, maybe not easy but you… you get what I'm saying and I could still choose to hope, to believe. It made it hurt less in a way. I _had to_ hope because if I didn't.. If I didn't at least try I didn't think I'd ever be able to keep going. But right now… right now I'm trying so hard to do that and I can't. It hurts too much. It doesn't make sense."

"It doesn't have to make sense, Kara. It's a broken heart." It would be no small miracle if Kara actually heard her sister. Like legitimately listened to what she was saying. Because even though Alex didn't have any of the answers, not by a long shot, maybe Kara would stop being so hard on herself for just long enough to get some rest and heal, if only a little.

"I mean I know losing him means losing another connection to home, and other things but I can't figure it out." Alex doesn't have to see Kara's eyes to know they are about to brim over with tears again. She had watched Kara get closer and closer to letting go only for her to push them back down again. "Why won't it make sense Alex?" _Please, Alex. Just tell me why I feel this way. Tell me how to stop. Please. Just make it stop._

"Love doesn't make sense. Maybe this was the last straw, your limit. As much as you say you have I don't think you've ever dealt with all the crap you've had thrown your way. You've been pushing everything down and playing atlas for so long and trying to claim it was an easy burden… It's not Kara, and telling yourself it is or that its weak to struggle is not going to make it any easier. It might just end up crushing you." _And I can't just sit by and watch. I won't._ Alex hugs her just a little bit tighter still careful of the very sore torso but needing Kara to understand that she wouldn't leave no matter what and that she wasn't going just sit by and watch Kara wither away. Not any more. She never should have in the first place.

"Too late." And that might have been the first time since the Daximite invasion, hell maybe since Kara had put on the cape, that Alex had heard her admit that it all was too much. That she was being crushed by the pressure and all that came with the double life. As much as Kara loved it.. It was also killing her slowly. Alex understood having to live up to a lot of pressure. Kara had to as well growing up, it was just a little bit different. A little less overt. But it was still there.

Alex also remembered what it felt like to take a breath for the first time without all that weight. Some had been lifted when she had sworn in as an agent for the DEO. That "I do" had changed her life it had given her a purpose she actually liked. Something outside the expectations of her unsuspecting mother regardless the history it held for her father, regardless the implications it held for her sister.

However short lived that breath of fresh air had been when all that responsibility and pressure came crashing back it seemed almost twice as heavy. Then Kara had become supergirl. But then she had met Maggie and realized things about herself that she'd always fought against tooth and nail. That was the second one that had made all that pressure ease up. When someone asked if she liked women and she said, without hesitation, "I do."

And when Maggie had kissed her… when Maggie held her and told her everything was going to be ok… God Maggie. Maggie took that burden off of Alex like it was nothing. And just in time too. Alex could not wait for her third "I do" because she knew that as long as she had Maggie to help she could handle just about anything.

Her sister though, Kara was hurting and feeling the weight of it all and she knew that just as Maggie had helped to ease her own burden that Mon-El had his ways of doing that for Kara. Now that was missing. Because as much as the sisters loved each other and would do anything for one another they shared a burden but nothing made it liter much like having someone in your life that loved you the way Maggie or Mon-El did. "Kar,"

"Alex. I know you know there's no way to make it better. But please. I need you. I just need you." She plead with Alex to help hold her up because Kara felt like she was going to face plant so hard she'd never be able to scrape herself up from the ground. She wanted so badly to admit that she was breaking. That she could hardly keep it together any more. That she was honestly so close to giving up on herself it was a struggle to push those thoughts down. But she did. She always did.

Kara wasn't sure if having someone around helped her be strong because she was too afraid to break in front of them so she kept pushing or if it actually helped. She also wasn't sure if she could even let herself break after so many months of pushing. It was a pride thing at this point or maybe she just decided she'd suffered through it to this point why not keep going? It had to get better eventually, right? It couldn't possibly go on like this forever. Could it? Because she kept pushing it was both easier and harder the longer it went on. Easier because she didn't have to deal and it was her normal now but harder because it was so damn exhausting and it seemed like it took more energy everyday. And now that her head wasn't working and her body kept screaming at her and those broken ribs really weren't helping the empty sinking feeling she had in her chest it was just that much more difficult.

"You have me. I'm not going anywhere. Ok? Not now. Not ever." She promises knowing that she very well could be made to leave Kara with what she did for a living. But that didn't mean she wouldn't fight her hardest to never let that happen. Even when Kara pushed her away.

The still very injured kryptonian yawns in her sister's arms as she tries to hide a little groan where Alex had squeezed her just a bit too hard. The eldest knew Kara should be in a bed, not laying awkwardly propped up against her on this worn out couch. But she also knew that one, moving would be a chore - a painful chore - and two… her sister's bed held some fragile memories.. "Do you want to go to my apartment so you can lay in a bed? It'll really be better for you then the couch."

"We can stay here. I have to use it eventually." Kara steels herself as Alex helped her from the couch. Powers or no, she'd be the girl of steel if it killed her. She would admit that she was a little proud that the only sound she made was a little groan when she had to bend her hip just a little bit.

Alex hands her the crutches while still somehow making sure Kara doesn't fall to the side, still very uneasy on her feet with the spinning head and loss of one leg. Slowly.. Very slowly the sisters inch their way toward the bedroom. Kara stopping every three or so "crutches" across her apartment to dip her head and rest for a little while. Alex just walks beside her, bucket in one hand, other ready to catch Kara if she even thinks about falling. Eventually they're at the edge of Kara's "bedroom" and this time the hero pauses for an entirely differently reason. Her resolve gone with whatever energy she had possessed while lying on the couch. "Will you lay with me though?" _I can't do this alone._

"Absolutely," Alex says walking away a second to place the bucket on Kara's night stand but returning to her sister's side within the second. "I'm having withdrawals from your cuddles anyway." Which was true. Alex needed Kara's warm embrace about as much as she needed Maggies. Even though it was different, Alex had come to rely on her sister for emotional security. She was her best damn friend and she had been there… Kara had just saved her a lot and Alex felt like she was in constant need of saving when she was without her.

"God I feel so pathetic." Kara's head drops, bouncing once as it reached the limits of her neck's stretch forward. Her armpits resting on the tops of the crutches to give her ribs a break also serving to add to the defeat that was starting to cloud over her. "I'm sorry."

"It's not pathetic. Don't be so hard on yourself."

Kara wants to scoff at that. Of course that was easy for Alex to say. She wasn't the one who was hardly present in her own body at the moment concussed out of her mind or hardly able to use the crutches to make it the 20 feet across her apartment. Her bladder was calling her from her little bout of self degradation though as she bit her lip a little embarrassed to ask for help to use the toilet. "Can I use the bathroom first?"

"Yeah. Absolutely. You should be drinking more water anyway." Her sister says as she helps Kara into the bathroom. The blonde taking one arm and holding onto Alex as she was much sturdier than the crutches as she wiggled the waistband of the sweats down with the other hand. It was slow and it was frustrating but Kara'd be damned if she asked Alex to pull her pants down for her. When not much progress was made and whatever was being made was halted as Kara stiffened at the brush of the fabric over her hip Alex butted in unable to just let Kara do it as she had initially planned.

"Kar. Let me help." Kara looks up at her older sister, the blonde's immense focus, on not falling over as she tried to get the sweats down, now broken. Though sweat shines on her forehead and she's breathing a little heavier than she was a second ago the initial glare of challenge falls away as Alex steps closer to her. The older Danvers wraps Kara's arms around her shoulders for support as she carefully pulls the waistband wide before pulling it down to expose the SPIKA she had done the night before. Alex is sure to make quick work of the wrap and Kara's underwear before she helps Kara lean back hinging a little comically at the waste as she sits back.

At least her years in medical school and preparing for it had come in handy a little bit. Kara wasn't much different right now than one of the geriatric patients after a broken hip or hip replacement. That was a skill she'd never thought she'd need again, at least not till Eliza had grown much older. She makes it a point not to look at Kara but almost through her to allow her sister some sense of privacy even though she was still too out of it to really care.

As Kara stands back up again with Alex pretty much doing all the work for her, her sister leans her a little into the wall. Alex rewraps her hip and though it helped a little bit Kara hated how constricted she felt. The wrap was like it was tightening around her like one of those big snakes in the zoo. It made it a little harder to breathe. Not that it actually constricted her ribs or anything like that. It was just restrictive and Kara was starting to panic a little bit because she couldn't even begin to imagine if she hated feeling wrapped around by cloth how Mon-El must have felt in that pod.

 _God. He died like that._

 _Cramped._

 _Hardly able to breathe._

 _Body in shock from the lead._

 _Alone._

 _So._

 _So._

 _Alone._

A sob wracks itself from the Kryptonian. Kara starts to fall forward as her hands move to the freshly finished wrap trying to get it of. _Just get it off._ "Woah." Alex catches her as she dips forward, her good leg giving out. Alex's firm hands grab Kara's frantic ones away from the fresh spika and move around the back of Kara's waste to hold her up. Kara's head dropping to Alex's shoulder as she fell forward. Though Kara's hands find their way back to her hip as Alex just holds her up. The only thing keeping her from the full effects of gravity pulling her down to the cold tile floor of her bathroom. "Woah. Kara. Hey."

"Off. Get it off." The blonde starts panting. Her eyes not really seeing anything as she squeezes them shut. "I can't - I - I can't - I can't breathe. Alex."

"Kara." The older sister calls out still holding Kara up though that was growing more difficult with the wiggling.

"He can't - Mon… He can't breathe. He's-" Her hands grow more frantic pawing at her hip. Small whimpers escape each time her fingers touch the sensitive area. Alex can feel her shirt growing wet with tears and slobber and probably a little bit of that ever so sticky Kryptonian snot too. "He can't breathe Alex! He can't breathe! Get it off, Alex! Get it off!"

"Kara! Stop!" She barks wishing she had four arms so she could hold up her sister with two and move her hands away from one of the more injured hips she'd ever seen. Holding Kara up would have to do for now. "STOP!" Her little sister freezes being called back to reality from her panic to get the SPICA off. Kara straightens up as she stiffens, head lifting from Alex's shoulder as she starts to fall backward losing her balance. Her sweats still down around her ankles not helping with the whole falling down thing either as they act more like a tripwire than anything. "Woah." Alex has to dart forward again to catch her. She knew Kara was feeling cramped that's why she freaked but Alex had to hold her instead of giving her space. She couldn't just let her fall like that. Not with her injuries. "Hey. Easy. Kara I need you to look at me."

"Breathe." Those big, big blue eyes peek at her through the tears still leaving tracks down her sisters flushed cheeks. "I need you to breathe Kara. You're ok. I've got you." Slowly the hyperventilating settles. Alex arms feel like they're shouting at her for a rest. Kara might not be with her powers but she's still solid as fuck and pretty damn heavy for how small she really is. "There you go."

"Alex my - my chest. Its - I can't." The panting starts back again as Kara moves her hands from her sister's arms to press into her sternum. Something Alex knew she'd regret in a little bit for sure when this panic stopped and her ribs throbbed. But Kara didn't care about that right now. Her chest felt so tight like it was constricting her. Not letting her heart beat or her lungs take in air. It _ached_. It hurt so badly and she just needed it to stop.

The Kryptonian twists to the side and loses the remaining water in her stomach in the sink. Momentarily bracing herself up with her hands at the sink as she heaves forward. _Thank god for good aim._ Alex thinks for a moment before those thoughts are interrupted by a more pressing one as Kara's hands are back pressing into the flat of her chest - _Damn it Kara._ The almost doctor had to jet forward to catch Kara again so she didn't fall. Her hands holding Kara's elbows as she watches Kara struggle to breathe again.

Slowly she pulls Kara's hands away from her chest and lets her sister grip hard into her forearms. _Thank god she doesn't have her super strength right now. My arms would be toast._ "Deep breath, Kar. As deep as you can. I know it's hard... Good. Now out…" Alex continues to coach her through it wishing she could give her sister what she really needed but this would have to do for now.

Finally breathing as normally as one can with broken ribs Kara goes slightly limp in Alex's arms as the agent surges forward one more time to hold her up. "I've got ya. Do you think you can stay up if I give you your crutches?" She feels the small nod in confirmation against her shoulder. Reaching to the side in a precarious shift of the injured woman against her Alex grabs one crutch at a time and hands it to Kara. When they're in place and she's not as worried about Kara falling and hitting her head again Alex squats back down to pull Kara's sweats back up.

"I'm sorry." She drops her head. "I don't know… Usually I..."

"You are not a burden on me Kara. This is not a problem. I want to be here for you. I love you. So much." The only other sound in the bathroom is the running sink as Alex wets down a cloth. Kara sighs in relief as her sister wipes her sweat from her forehead and down the back of her neck. Then there's a water bottle for her to sip, Alex holding up the small trash can for Kara to spit into. So goes the silent dance as Alex get's Kara feeling a little better.

Slowly they make it back to the bedroom. Alex taking the crutches and leaning them against the night stand as she helps Kara slide below the blankets. Carefully Alex guides Kara's bad hip into the bed. Little squeaks and grunts make Alex pause every so often to give her a break. It's a process but at least she won't be falling over.

The kryptonian is in bed. Blankets pulled up. Eyelids growing heavy again as the clear blue grows foggy with new bouts of her concussion now that the adrenaline is leaving her system. Alex presses a kiss to her forehead as she leaves to go clean the bathroom.

A small "stay" squeaks through the air of the apartment as it moves from somber to more peaceful with each second Kara grows closer to sleep. Or unconsciousness. Alex didn't really know which one was more applicable to her sister's current state. "Please."

"I'll be right back. I promise. Just close your eyes Kar." She fights her instinct to leave the mess till later but it would just grow more gross and she'd feel really bad if Maggie or Lena would walk in on that. Again thank goodness for Kara's good aim, because Alex is back with her in a matter of minutes.

"Alex."

Alex places freshly acquired ice packs on the nightstand closest to Kara as she bends down over top of her sister. "I'm here" she whispers against the young woman's forehead. "I brought some ice." She gently rubs an hand over Kara's arm trying to stir her awake just enough to maneuver her. When Kara tries to sit up though Alex uses a firm grip on her shoulder to keep her where she had settled. "You stay. I'll take care of it. Ok?"

"Yeah. Ok." Kara mummers sleepily moving her hands as Alex folds the blanket down to Kara's mid thigh. Slowly she lifts the edge of Kara's shirt and wiggles it enough to get it up from where it was caught between her sister and the bed. She sucks in a sharp breath at yet another look at her sister's torso. Abs straining against the discomfort of all those scraps and bruises. The deep discoloration around the epicenter of the fracture in her ribs yellowing just a bit at the edges.

Alex secures the icepack and replaces Kara's shirt with a tender ease about it before laying the other ice against the girl's hip and wrapping the cast in a larger more flexible one. Covering her sister back up she watches as Kara brows furrow and she starts to shiver a little bit. It hurts her, it hurts the way her little sister just laid there and let Alex help her get set. Letting Alex's hands push hers back when she tried to help or easing her back down when she tried to shift to make it easier. It hurt to know that Kara was trying but was so depleted that she'd actually listen to being told just to let Alex do it.

The older sister breathes for a moment before she slides into the opposite side of the bed slipping beneath the covers and scooching over so her hip is touching Kara's good one. The sides of their bodies pressing against one another as Alex loops her arm behind Kara's head. Numb arms and aching shoulders be damned.

A sleepy "You good?" is mumbled as Kara leans her head into her sister's shoulder. Shifting so she was leaning against Alex for the most part. It was a little bit of an awkward angle as Kara was laying most of the way down but Alex didn't mind. As long as Kara was comfortable. And if the way she was getting lost in the warmth of Alex's embrace was any indication, she was.

"Don't worry about me." Alex fights a chuckle. Of course Kara would make sure she was comfortable. She already could feel her arm falling asleep but she wasn't about to tell Kara that. "Are you comfortable? Hip? Ribs? Ice ok?"

"Yes." She yawns just before she starts to shake the pain returning to her hip and ribs from her little bout in the bathroom. "They hurt. It hurts." She grows tense again in the bed trying to move as little as possible but the more she tenses the more she shakes and the worse it hurts.

The coldness of the ice biting into Kara's now vulnerable nerves. It stung. It hurt. It itched a little. Alex used to hate that but now it's something she's grown used to. Maggie's made sure of that. The number of times the detective had gently placed ice packs on Alex's own injuries reminding her to take care of herself was too many to count. Alex was kind of feeling lucky she'd had such a good example of what to do as she tried to help Kara. "Relax, Kara. I know it's hard but it'll help." Still Kara strains, fresh ripples of pain moving through her hip.

"Take it off. It's too cold." She shivers fighting back tears. "It hurts."

"Shhhhh, Kar. I know. I know it does. Give it a few minutes and it will feel better." She catches Kara's hand as it reaches to take the ice away from her ribs. "Leave it, Kara. I promise it's going to help."

"S-s-sorry." She chatters out as she shakes. Hating that she's making Alex have to hold her while she panics and now while she's acting like a child wanting out of something that she knows she needs to be doing. God she feels like such a child. The media did that to her enough. Painted her like a juvenile. She was not. Any one who knew her knew that even though she was often goofy and tended to lean more optimistic than not on most days she was far from a child. She hadn't been since the day she left her home planet and she would never be again. "I d-don't know why I'm shaking."

"You're in pain. It's ok. Close your eyes. We will get more meds in you in a couple of hours. Take a deep breath, deep as you can. There ya go." Alex pretty much coaches her little sister to sleep. There was a lot they needed to talk about. A lot. But that could wait for now. Right now Kara just needed to rest and Alex needed that sweet relief that came with sleep to wash over her sister because her being in this much pain even with the medication was not something Alex felt good about. Not at all.

They stay like that for hours Alex just watched tv with low volume and held Kara. Quietly soothed her when she would stir in her sleep. Glancing wearly at each little movement her sister made needing to know if she was trying to get comfortable or being haunted by a nightmare. Though eventually Alex dozed off. Her head resting sideways against Kara's. One arm around her sister's shoulder the other holding her arm resting against Alex's torso.

"Hey, Danvers." Maggie leans over the bed placing a kiss to Alex's forehead. She loved that she got to do that. Alex loved it even more though. She had always been kind of jealous at couples that were like that. That could love so easily. Now she had that and it was the most amazing thing. "Al. Babe. Wake up."

Alex wiped some drool from the corner of her mouth as she slowly blinked her eyes open rubbing her right one hard before letting her hand fall back to where it rested on Kara's arm. "Hmmmm. What's up?"

"Nothing. Just brought some food. How's she doing?" Maggie was going to tease her about how she was supposed to be watching Kara not sleeping with her but the two sleeping were about the cutest thing she'd ever seen. She couldn't help take pictures. God they were cute.

"She's slept since about nine." Alex glances sideways at Kara still sleeping. Still using her shoulder as a pillow despite Alex having exactly zero feeling in her arm. "She had a little bit of a panic attack I think. We need to talk about it, I know but she was so wiped and in so much pain Mags."

Maggie tilts her head sympathetically. She'd suspected Kara'd been pushing those down with a surprising amount of control. She saw how the girl had to pull herself away sometimes to take a few extra breaths or how she'd just take off and go flying. Alex saw it too but, god love her, she didn't want to think that Kara was struggling that much and was feeling that lonely that she couldn't go to her.

The door creaks open in the main room and Maggie's hand flies to her gun immediately as they weren't expecting anyone. Alex had maneuvered quickly from under a still very asleep Kara to the night stand where she had left her weapon. Each woman kept their weapon down at the ground but at the ready just to be safe.

Kara really did need to lock her door more. This time though Alex supposed it was her fault. She'd thought she had locked it up. Maggie thought she had locked it behind her as well which was concerning in its own right. The clack-clack of heels against hardwood grow closer. "Anybody home?" A warm, familiar voice calls into the apartment just as Lena pops her head through the little separator to Kara's bedroom. Maggie and Alex both try to put their weapons away quickly but Lena catches them and gives the two a pointed look with her famous arched eyebrow. "You two are paranoid."

"Yeah. Maybe." Maggie huffs as she tucks her service weapon back into its home on her hip. "Better paranoid than dead." She defends knowing full well that her and Alex's habbit of reaching for a weapon every someone knocked on the door or the way her fingers usually danced over her hip where her weapon usually was when she felt uneasy wasn't the healthiest thing in the world. Their hypervigilance was going to catch up to them eventually. Though for now each was ok with letting it keep them maybe just a little safer. "Was it unlocked?"

"What?" Lena places her hands defiantly on her hips as she stands in the now somewhat crowded space. "No. Kara gave me a key months ago." She had. Kara told her to use her apartment if she didn't feel safe returning to her own and it wasn't like Kara was ever there anyway. Lena could count on one hand the times she'd actually bumped into Kara when she'd stopped over.

Though she'd admit that it wasn't just to hang out. She was trying to track down her best friend. She was really fucking worried about her. She could tell the bed had hardly been slept in. There wasn't any food in the place - Lena made sure she kept some of the basics there just incase. It took a few weeks but eventually she noticed having to restock little snacks like the carrots or the apples. She didn't know if Kara knew it was her or if she thought it was Alex but she hadn't really cared at that point. As long as she knew Kara was eating something.

The few times she had run into Kara were awkward as ever. Once she'd seen the girl in a towel. Once she could have sworn she came out of nowhere when Lena thought the apartment was empty. Though now she supposed Kara had just flown in her back window. It's a wonder Lena hadn't figured it out sooner.

The older two share a look of intrigue, smiles dancing in their eyes because of course Kara gave Lena a key before she really knew the secret. What a freaking idiot. "Well then Luthor, welcome to the party."

"Any chance you brought food, babe? I'm starving." Alex's stomach rumbles for good measure as she pats her stomach. "Like my stomach is eating itself."

"Yeah. Danvers. I brought food." Maggie rolled her eyes standing up from the edge of the bead where she had taken a load off. It had already been a long busy morning for the cop with the city's hero on the IR for the time being. "Don't be so dramatic."

"I brought over some as well. Double the food then."

"Well… under normal circumstances that would be perfect because sleeping beauty over there is a freaking black hole." Alex says as she climbs out of the bed giving Kara one last look to make sure she was ok. The girl hadn't even stirred. Which was good. Alex wasn't expecting that. Kara hadn't even clung to her when she had to move to get her weapon. Alex misses a response from her sister's friend when she chuckles out something along the lines of " _Oh believe me I know._ " She just covers Kara back up slowly as she checks her forehead for a fever again. Thankfully there's nothing. "But I don't want to wake her up just yet. Soon though, she needs some meds, but not yet."

"She'll be ok in here for a while. Come on, Danvers." Maggie gently pulls Alex from her sister's bedside. A soft hand at her hip and one on her shoulder. Lena just watches as the two interact. She'd never been one for wanting a relationship but seeing the love that Alex and Maggie had made her wish for something. Maggie guides Alex into the kitchen and basically sits her down on her stool at the little island thing while her and Lena plate some food.

Alex mumbles thank you through food filled cheeks and Maggie can't help but smile from where she stands across the island. Hands planted and head cocke to the side in her trademark look as she watched Alex get lost in the food. _Jesus how the hell did Eliza feed these girls when they were kids?_ They must have been even worse as teenagers.

The difference between her fiance and Lena are so comical it's hard to keep from laughing. Lena sits next to Alex carefully unwrapping the plastic fork and knife set and placing a napkin on her lap before she classily takes a bite of some salad. Slow and steady for Lena. Maggie knew she fell somewhere in between in the way she ate but still it was fun to watch the difference.

"Babe, aren't you going to eat?" Alex calls her back into the room looking at her with curiosity in her eyes. Maggie can only shake her head. Truthfully she's no hungry. She never had much of an appetite. Not compared to Alex or Kara. She'd snacked and had a fair amount of coffee at work anyway. "You good?"

"Yeah. Tough case." She makes sure to smile to let Alex know she really was ok. This case would be hard though. Most cases were. Murdered homeless alien. So far it just looked like something random. Nothing really she could do. They already had a strong suspect in custody. Cut and dry robbery gone wrong. Alex nods and hums in appreciation. She got it. Maggie knew they'd talk later about it too. There little catch up sessions were often the best parts of her day and they always did it. Usually right after dinner on the couch as they laid down to watch some TV and unwind unless one of them had to work late. Then it was a phone call. Sometimes even an impromptu coffee break supplemented with a light dinner just to make sure the other one was ok.

The three ate their lunch in silence. Maggie stealing the ocasional bite from Alex's plate of french fries only to earn a light slap on the hand as Alex told her to get her own. Lena just ate her salad and sipped on what Alex knew to be a chocolate milkshake. The Luthor wasn't fooling anyone with her healthy meals. Her lunch time treat was something Alex had discovered a couple months back and the little quirk made Lena seem that much more like family. The young CEO didn't say much throughout lunch just lost in her thoughts or quietly observing as she generally did unless Kara was there to pull her into her slightly more lively side. But when asked she updates the other women on her current projects and how work is going.

She really appreciated that they both genuinely actually care. It's amazing really, the people Kara had found to surround herself with. "I brought some nail polish over for Kara. Her toes look so angry and swollen. I thought some fresh pastels might be a little pick-me-up." She places a light tangerine colour on the table causing the other two to laugh. The color was perfect for Kara really. Alex just hoped that it would be well received by her sister who she knew wasn't exactly feeling bright and sunny lately. "I finished up early today so I'll just wait till she wakes up. You can go take care of things if you need to, Alex."

"No, I took the next few days off baring no intergalactic crisis or whatever. But um, I probably need to wake her up to get some more meds in her. Some food wouldn't hurt either." The older sister stands and makes her way into Kara's room. Maggie stays planted in the kitchen but Lena can't help but be pulled to watch for some reason.

Alex sits slowly on the edge of the bed careful not to depress the mattress too close to Kara's injured hip. She leans over her little sister and brushes a sweat dampened curl from her cheek and the end from the corner of her mouth. "Kar, wake up. I've got your medicine and some food." Nothing. "It's a bacon cheeseburger from Edna's."

"Mon. Ten more minutes." She murmurs wrapping her fingers into Alex's hand that rests in the older woman's waste. "You said you'd wake up with me. Please." The little Kryptonian tugs forward a little bit trying to pull her boyfriend for more cuddles. He really did give the best hugs. And god, the way she could tuck into him. There weren't many places she felt more content. Not even flying.

"Kara." A women's voice pulls Kara quickly from her still slightly dreaming state. When her eyes pop open to see Alex looking down at her with _that_ look. The one that showed how much her sister's sleepy confusion broke her heart.

Tears start falling down Kara's cheeks. "Oh." A lite whisper barely reaches Lena's ears from where she stands near the opposite side of the bed. Her cheeks growing pink in embarrassment for her mix up and from the irritation of the tears. "Oh god." The tears really start then as Kara twists enough to wrap her arms around Alex.

The older sister pulls her in close holding her awkwardly and looking at Lena with pleading eyes. _What do I do? How do I make this better?_ But the Luther has no answers. Not a single one. The two just look at each other, both pairs of eyes growing watery as Kara clings to Alex.

Not two minutes later Kara lets go, and Alex lets her. The injured hero really wants to sink into the mattress and disappear forever. "Kara, hey. What about some food so you can take more of the pain meds. Maggie grabbed your favorite recovery food from Edna's. Mr. Bob says hi."

Kara loved their greasy buttery burgers and the thick bacon stacked on top. It was usually the first thing she craved when she got hurt. The only thing really she kept down with the percocet. It made no sense to Alex but, hey, as long as it was good for Kara she wasn't going to question it.

"I'll take the medicine but I'm really not hungry." _Please don't fight me on this Alex._ Kara was so embarrassed that she'd let her sister see that. More so that she'd mistaken her sister for her dead boyfriend. She was hungry, she had hardly eaten half a pancake this morning but she didn't think she could stomach anything after what had just happened.

Her dream was so nice. That some one of her and Mon-El in the field. When it was dreams like that she never wanted to wake up. If it was only dreams like that she'd want to sleep all the time. But it wasn't. And even when it was waking up was so much more painful than just never sleeping at all.

"You need some food in your stomach, or you're going to get sick again." Alex prompts dumping two more pills into her hand.

"I'm going to get sick either way. Might as well be dry heaving instead of wasting food. Give it to Skip on the corner." Kara props herself up on her elbows quickly popping the pills into her mouth and letting Alex help her sip some water down. She really hated the bitterness but at this point she'd do just about anything to make the pain in her hip stop. It was stinging and stabbing and so sharp. She'd never felt something that sharp for so long before. Throbbing would be better than this for sure.

Skip was the homeless guy on the corner. Kara always gave him some of her food when she passed him. She often put those carrots or whatever her sister and Lena left in her apartment in his little set up. She had been very close to giving him Mon-El's clothes a few times but she could never quite bring herself to part with his things. She knew she needed too. Skip needed them. She did in her own way she guessed but it's not like she actually allowed them to comfort her. His smell. The feeling of his clothes. No. She just left them in the box below her bed.

Hell moving his stuff from his drawer to that box had been hard enough. But seeing his clothes folded next to hers. Just waiting. Waiting to be pulled over his shoulders in that goofy little way he always slid into his shirts. Waiting for him to wiggle into his pants even though they fit him just fine. Waiting for no damn reason because he was gone and he was never coming back. Kara had made sure of that.

"Half the burger." Alex cupped the back of Kara's neck and helped her ease back into the mattress. She folded the blankets back again, lifting the edge of Kara's shirt to expose the bottom edge of her sports bra. Being careful of the tender skin she removes the bandages from her sister's torso one by one. Kara sucks in little breaths as the tape parts with her raw skin, her eyes remaing shut though her eyelids flutter as she tenses every so often.

"Fine." Alex tries not to smile in her small victory as she takes the warm washcloth Lena had so thoughtfully provided and starts to clean the cuts again. She noticed the water provided smelled of hibiclens, a medicated soap, as she looked up at Lena for a split second to mouth her thank you. Kara had yet to notice her best friend and that was probably for the better.

Kara winced as Alex went on gently riding the reddened flesh of tape residue and carefully going over each cut. There were a lot. To many to count. Similar to when toddlers scraped their knees, elbows, hands and arms. Similar to how she had been after long weekends of softball, soccer or surf tournaments growing up.

Alex paused to check one particularly angry looking cut with her fingers. It was still open a little bit and she really should have fixed it up better yesterday but it needed closed. Wordlessly she looks at Lena who seems to understand and hands her a packet of that super glue stuff from her little kit she'd left in the kitchen. The Luthor never ceases to amaze her in the way she reads a situation. Hell she didn't really expect Lena to know what to look for but here they were.

Kara's head leaps from the pillow as she looks down at where the fresh wave of stinging was coming from. "Shit! Alex!" Alex was holding it closed as the glew set, blowing gently which was really doing next to nothing to soothe the sting. "A warning would have been nice." Alex glanced up with a raised eyebrow at her sister. Cussing. That was new. And amusing. "I'm not some innocent angel Alex. I can say swear words."

"Do I need to bring the soap in the Little Danvers?" Maggie calls from the kitchen completely teasing. She knew Alex had had her mouth washed out plenty as a kid. Hell she had too. It was funny now and she laughs at the thought of Kara ever needing such a punishment because it was a little past the realm of the imaginable.

The target of the teasing and Alex's small chuckle drops her head back to the pillow with a huff. "You're fiance is really annoying. You know that?" Lena doesn't do much better thank Alex at holding back a laugh. Kara's head sinks into the pillow as she turns to the other side of the room, her cheeks growing pink again. "How long have you been there?"

"Since you woke up." Her green eyes go soft at Kara's deflated posture as she lays there.

"Oh so you saw…" Lena doesn't need to nod for Kara to get that she did in fact see her little mix up and subsequent breakdown. "Good." She huffs sarcastically turning to look back at the sealing. "Good." She doesn't catch the look again between her sister and her best friend. But if she had Kara'd be getting a little tired of them being so worried about her. She was fine, damn it.

Alex tries to focus on cleaning the rest of the wounds with some alcohol. To her credit Kara doesn't really react at all. Though when gentle fingertips spread some antibiotic cream over the newly closed cut the alien digs her head back into the pillow and squeezes her eyes shut. "These will be gone in a few days tops." Kara groans out. "Do you really have to do that?"

Alex is taping fresh gauze over the more severe cuts "It's probably going to be longer than a few days." Alex had nothing to go on but she had a bad feeling that this solarflare might last a couple of weeks. Slowly she replaces Kara's shirt over her torso. "What do you say about getting into the kitchen for some food?"

"Um… can you just help me sit up here? I'm not really sure I can make it that far." The pounding in her head was growing and it was getting harder to focus again. Standing up really didn't sound like fun. Not at all. Nor did getting resituated. Kara really didn't want to puke again.

"Yeah, of course." Alex slips her hand between Kara's shoulder blades to lean her up slowly as Lena places pillows behind her back and head. "That ok?"

"Yeah." Kara glances over at her best friend who has taken her own perch on the other side of the bed. The two hold each other's gazes for a while. "Yeah. Thanks."

"I'm going to grab you the burger. Hang tight." Alex can read the room and gives Kara some space. She'd be there when Kara was ready to talk to her but for now Kara needed to talk to Lena. Alex thought it was likely to make the embarrassment go away for something Kara had no need to be embarrassed about.

"Lena I'm-"

"Kara, darling, if you're about to apologize for what happened, don't." The CEO paused to give her friends hand a squeeze over to the top of her very fluffy comforter. Kara didn't exactly squeeze back but she kept her hand there for Lena to hold. That was something at least. Those bright green eyes Kara was always so fascinated with disappeared behind a long bline as Lena sighed and Kara hated that she was hurting her friend this way. "You know, after Jack died, you came to my office and you held me. And you told me that you'd always be there."

"Lena-"

She makes a point to look into Kara's eyes. Those glowing blue irises that plead with her to stop. God, Lena had never seen anything more blue… and she went to a private school where girls wore colored contacts because they could. "Then at his funeral you sat next to me and held my hand. And you put the flowers on his casket when I couldn't. Then weeks later when it finally hit me. When I stopped feeling cold and distant and numb you held me then too. You took the scotch from my hand in my office. And you just sat next to me. You didn't say anything but you sat there while I stare a hole in my floor. Then you slept at my house for two days to make sure I was ok. You didn't have to do any of that."

"Kara. You. You were there. When I didn't want you to be. When no one else was. When I would have gotten through being alone for those nights with drinking and no sleep…" Lena knew she was strong but then she hadn't felt like it so much. Truthfully she would have been fine without anyone there. She had gotten through everything else in her life alone. She knew she would do it again. But the thing was is she didn't have too. She didn't have too anymore because she had Kara and all that came with her. "And you've continued to be there even when it is so clear that you are hurting too."

Kara remembered those nights. She remembered carrying Lena back to her bed after she'd slumped over asleep a little too drunk on wine to care that she was about to fall out of the stool. She remembered sleeping on the couch and listening carefully to make sure she slept ok. She knew she didn't have to. That Lena would be just fine but she wanted to because Kara knew first hand how terrible it was to deal with loss all on your own. And yeah, having someone there for you might have made it a little more emotional and painful for the time being but that was far better than feeling so empty you thought your chest would just implode.

At least that's what Kara knew to be true. And even know she knew. She did. Kara had ran from that same comfort for six months. She'd gone cold. She'd run away. She'd thrown herself at work. She'd tried every trick in the book to not _feel_ again. Because she couldn't. That familiar ache in her chest would never go away. Not completely. She knew that. She'd lived with that for more than half of her life now. The familiarity of it was far from a comfort and this loss, the loss of something she had longed for since she was a child. The loss of the love of her life. A partner who loved her and held her and was everything she needed despite how infuriating he could be. A partner who made her better and let her be weak and took care of her without making her feel like she was a burden. A partner who made her laugh. _Rao, how he made me laugh…_

So this loss was new. This loss was horrible in ways that the others weren't. Because before she'd always hoped for a partner who would fill all her broken places and make her _happy_ when she never thought she could truly be. Now that hope was gone. Because she'd had it and she'd lost it. No. She hadn't lost it. She'd let it slip through her fingers. She'd thrown it away like it was _nothing_.

"And I am not going to leave you, Kara Danvers. I'm done letting you feel alone. I care, Kara. And I see that you're aching." She drags her fingers across the backs of Kara's still bruised knuckles just along the edge of the bruise more so on the back of her hand. Lena knew. She got it. She'd never had anyone. She'd had plenty of people who'd come and gone though. Ones who she had let in, confided in, trusted. Ones who she thought would be there for her that. Ones that never checked in on her with any genuine care. Ones that never stuck around. So sure people had told her that they were there for her but Kara Danvers had been the only one to ever show it.

Because Lena wasn't sure if she had just gotten so good at hiding it that people really didn't know. Which she was sure that was part of it. Or if no one cared enough to see it. And that was what made her heart hurt the most.

Just on que Alex swoops in to save Kara as she flounders to come up with a response. She didn't want to speak for fear of crying and she couldn't push Lena away after that because her friend would see right through it. She was stuck. And She'd heard everything Lena had said through her eyes had started to close somewhere along the lines of _When Jack Died_. "One half of a burger coming right up." She twists through the door with a plate in hand, balancing on her palm as the fries slid across the smooth glass.

Lena sits back moving her hand with the added pair of eyes in the room. She loved Kara but she didn't really know where she fit with Alex. The eldest Danvers had let her in, she treated her like family. Lena had even used her connections to help them plan the wedding. However, when it came to caring for Kara, Lena didn't know how Alex felt about her comforting Kara like this. If she felt it was her job, no one else's. But if the gentle smile Alex gave her was any indication than Lena was more than welcome to show her baby sister that more people cared about her than the one who had been raised too.

Alex takes her seat again next to Kara and puts the plate down on the Kryptonian's lap. Kara still has her eyes closed not quite ready to open them. She didn't want her emotions to spill over again and keeping them shut really did help her head feel better She also wasn't ready to taste the food.

"She's pretty out of it but I know she appreciates you being here, Lena." _I'm not that out of it Alex._ But she was.. She really was. "Those words meant a lot." And Kara knows that Lena's little speech had meant a lot to her as well. She'd always worried Kara would only have her. Even the super friends loved her sister like their own but James and Winn weren't here. Not that it was their fault they weren't… but still. Lena was here. And Lena saw ways only Alex thought she could. "Come one, Sunshine. Food now. Sleep after."

Kara opens her eyes slowly to realize that someone had dimmed the lights for her so they weren't quite so harsh. Alex hands her a napkin and Lena stands to leave to give the sister's space again. To give Kara a little time to process what, if any, of that she heard. But the Luther woman is stopped by a hand squeezing her forearm. "Stay."

"Ok." She nods back.

At one time Lena had thought she'd never see the "FBI" Agent smile but now being on the receiving end of one yet again takes her a little by surprise. Alex leans forward to press a kiss to Kara's head as she stands up. "Love you, Kar. Lena, me and Maggie will just be in the kitchen if you need anything."

By the time Lena looks back at her friend the majority of the fries are gone. Kara's smiling just a little as the food feels warm in her belly. She had been getting a little hungry as much as she didn't want to admit it. And _damn_ Mr. Bob made the best burgers and fries in the entire universe. _Hell the multiverse._

Kara always liked how she could sit in silence with Lena and feel completely comfortable with it. She really appreciate it. Being alone. Together. She works her way through a little over half the burger that Alex had put on her plate and the majority of the fries. Though she lets her eyes flutter close agin her hands resting on the edge of the plate.

The young reporter was clearly done, having given in to the pull on her eyelids once more. Slowly Lena slides the plate from Kara's hands watching as her fingers move only slightly around the smoothe glass that is no longer there. As softly as she can she slides it onto the nightstand on her side of the bed. The wait shift akin to someone getting up make's Kara's eyes crack open again.

"Lena?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

"Always." She says in that Lena way of drawing out the word. Kara always did love her accent.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN -**

 **Fam, sorry for the "code vomit" earlier when I posted. Idk but it happens sometimes. Oh well.**

 **Anyway. Sorry for such the long wait. Life got a lil busy and writers block is a thing so this took way longer than I had hoped. The next chapter is mostly finished as well so there shouldn't be that long of a wait for it. Thank you so much for your patience and sticking with it.**

 **I had a lot of fun with this chapter. Please yell at me or tell me what ya think!**

* * *

Not two days later when Lena walks into in Kara's apartment after work Kara is in her bed… again… Trying to keep her eyes open… again. She finds it adorable. Sleepy Kara is a side of soft Lena had never experienced before. She was a little clingy, while her injuries didn't really allow for cuddling Kara liked to hold someone's hand or be as close to who ever was keeping her company as possible. She sits down on the bed for a while next to Kara, leaning against the headboard as she works. Soft breaths moving Kara's shoulder where it has found contact with Lena's hip.

Eventually Lena stands up and walks by the window to open the blinds the sun still high in the sky. Hopefully those rays could help Kara a little more and not bother her head so much. The length of this level of severity of a concussion was starting to be concerning. She watches as Kara smiles where the sunlight hits her. Her eyes fluttering open. "Hey, when'd you get here?"

"Not long ago." It'd been a couple of hours. Lena just took a seat near Kara's hip on her side of the bed resting part of her body weight on the mattress and watching as Kara struggled to keep her eyes open. "Kara, close your eyes. You still need to rest."

"All I do is sleep anymore." Kara yawns as she protests stealing any validity from her argument before it could even begin.

"You need it darling." Lena takes a second to brush her hand over Kara's forehead tucking those cute little fly aways back away from Kara's skin before following it up with a quick press of her lips to Kara's hair line. Lena could have sworn the Kryptonian's reaction was about the same to the way she seemed to blossom in the sun. "It's ok."

"I'm so bored, Lena. All I do is sleep and lay around. You and Alex won't even let me watch TV." The pout is so similar to Ruby those years ago when she would complain about not getting something it pulls a small smile to Lena's lips. Kara is a child.

Maggie walks in at just the right moment pulling Lena from her remembrance "that's because your ass still has a concussion. Hey Luthor." A small thud fills the apartment as Maggie tosses her badge onto the table in Kara's kitchen area before placing her gun next to it.

It wasn't exactly Lena's first choice of how to handle a moping hero but Maggie had her own way of handling Kara that seemed to work alright. "Hello Maggie. Go to sleep Kara. ok? Just listen to your body. You can hardly keep your eyes open." To her surprise superhero relents as Lena tucks a blanket around her and drops another kiss to her forehead. She didn't even care that it'd only been a couple of minutes since the last one. Kara was hurting and Lena was pretty sure this made both of them feel better. It was platonic enough… "I'll be right here ok? Just close your eyes."

When there isn't much more than a content, sleepy, humm in response Lena approaches Maggie as she grabs a beer from Kara's fridge in the kitchen. Moving around the familiar space she grabs a cup from the cabinet, filling herself up a glass of water from Kara's sink and taking a long draw before filling it again. Yes, she was the kind of billionaire who still drank from the tap. Judge her. She hears the tell-tail clink of metal on glass as Maggie cracks open her beer. The worried sister in-law sighs as she spares a glance in Kara's direction. "Do we have any idea when she'll get her powers back?"

"The radiation levels in her cells are all normal for her. I think she just needs to rest to let that convert to energy/powers. Not sleeping for 6 weeks… that is a lot. Even for a solar powered idiot. It might also have something to do with her mental health... Have you guys talked to her about the panic attacks?"

Kara had been having them for a while now. Lena suspected longer than she'd let on to anyone. The way she talked about usually doing something to fix it amidst her apologies for them happening when she'd wake from a nightmare or something. Lena's sure the nightmare's haven't helped, all this sleeping… there really was no other option though. Lena wanted desperately to take that pain away from Kara. She'd do anything.

Maggie was just wanting Kara to let anyone be there for her. She shouldn't have to deal with those alone. She shouldn't have to deal with any of this alone. They were trying their hardest not to let her but sometimes Kara had to meet them halfway. "Not yet. Alex tried a couple of times but no dice. That is on the menu for tonight though."

Lena hums in acknowledgement as she puts her glass down. Her hands brace most of her body weight on the edge of the counter as she lets the cool artificial granite press into her hip bones. "If she's awake." Kara hadn't really been for days and if she was it wasn't like she was really all there. Between the pain meds, the concussion, and the exhaustion Kara was in full space cadet mode and trying to talk to her in such a vulnerable position when she wouldn't likely have a filter just seemed like cheating.

"Yeah," Maggie sighs doing that Danvers thing of wiping her hand over her face before taking another drink of her beer "if she's awake." Kara had been sleeping so much Maggie couldn't wrap her head around it and the thing was is even though all she was doing was sleeping pretty much the hero still looked absolutely exhausted. We're talking like two black eyes kind of exhausted. "You want to stick around for that? I know you've been over here a lot lately and probably need to get some work done -"

"If that's ok?"

"What, if you stay for that?"

"Yeah."

"Of course it's ok. Are you kidding? She'll need you here I think. Alex tried to talk to her a few times about it and she shuts down a little." More than a little and they all knew that. Kara would describe these things she felt and Maggie being the emotionally mature and put together person that she was and Lena being the product of many hours with her own therapist knew that what she was describing was borderline clinical depression, anxiety, and probably post traumatic stress.

"Do you think if there as all of us here it'll be like we're gaining up on her?" Lena drops from her now tingling palms to her elbows as she moves her hips away from the counter just a little bit. Lilian would be so pissed about her posture and her leaning on stuff like a heathen but Lilian could kiss her ass.

Maggie is diving back into the fridge to pull out a veggie tray someone had stuck in there. She wasn't complaining, she loved the vegan friendly options that filled Kara's fridge recently, but it was still concerning and a little weird. "That's a fair point." She punctuated her thought with a crunch of a carrot.

"Maggie. I have an idea but you guys will just have to trust me." Lena pulls a piece of broccoli from the tray and earns a little glare from the Detective for taking her food. "I bought this. Relax."

Maggie only shrugs and pushes the tray a little closer to her friend and Kara's whatever the hell she was. "Sounds like a plan." The almost-Danvers rolls her shoulders back and cracks her neck likely from a long day of cases. Lena's days were long and often stressful but somehow Alex and Maggie's lifestyle seemed to be right on upthere with hers. And not to mention more physically demanding. "How bad is this concussion?"

"From what I can tell pretty bad." Lena wasn't really a physician. She had studdied medicine and was technically an MD but she still didn't consider herself able to really practice. She never did a residency or any of that she just found Medical school a fun challenge. "She's still pretty loopy and I know her head is killing her."

"Is that the pain meds though?" Maggie queries. She always gets a little delirious when she's gotta take them.

"No it's a little more punch drunk than high." Alex comes in the apartment interjecting herself into the conversation like she'd been there the whole time. "I'm just glad she never figured out how to fake it.. Its' like - so easy." The older sister says through a mouthful of broccoli before making a face at the two women's choice of snack.

"It's what Danvers?" Maggie asks her as she starts searching Kara's pantry for some more favorable snacks. Ever the Danvers, always munching on something.

"Oh um… " She rubs the back of her neck as she freezes in her tracks at the pointed question from her fiance. "I've heard it's easy to fake pass a concussion test."

"You've heard?" Maggie scoffs as she crosses her arms. Wanting to slap Alex upside the head and remind her of her profession. _Danvers. I am a detective for christ's sake._

Alex tries to play it of with a shrug. For a secret agent for a secret government agency she sure does suck at lying. Lena can't help but wonder if it's just that Maggie is that good or if it's that Alex will be threatened with consequences if she doesn't comply. From the way Alex swallows before answering "yeah, ya know from the guys," Lena would guess that Maggie withholding sex probably wasn't off the table.

"The guys?" Alex was in Troubleeeee. Oh boy was she in trouble. She knew it. Lena knew it. Maggie was pressing it so it was clear. How many times did they have to have this same damn conversation?

"Ok fine. Fine. I've been doing it since high school. First it was to play still. Then it was to be medically cleared for the DEO. The it was to keep working." She motions dismissively with the back of her hand. "You knew that."

"Jesus christ." Like hell she did. Maggie wanted to strangle Alex sometimes for how little regard she actually showed for her own body and well being. It was absolutely insane. The proud stories of playing with broken fingers or fractured ankles or other random bullshit really made Maggie pissed that no one had ever told Alex that it was ok to be injured sometimes. It had taken a lot of work to even get Alex to show her the aches and pains from their lifestyle.

"Mags it's fine. I'm fine. They don't count if they're not in your medical record." She tried to joke herself out of this one without much luck.

"You ar r. Alex. A doctor."

"That's part of why it's so easy." The woman before her tosses another chip into her mouth as Maggie struggles not to let her jaw hit the floor. How. How. Could. She. Be. Such. An. Idiot?

Lucy Lane interjects as she walks into the apartment dropping a duffel bag off at the door before kicking her shows off. "Jesus. Quit digging would you, Danvers?"

"Lucy! Glad you could make it." The bag of chips and this oh-so-maddening conversion forgotten as the agent wraps her friend in a hug. "She'll be glad to see you."

"Glad to see you too." Lucy pats Alex's back a little awkwardly. She never was much of a huger. She nods in the detective's direction "Maggie."

Maggie gives her a look of amusement as she tilts her head down in greeting, "Lane. It's good to see you." Maggie always did like the woman, even if she had almost given Alex to CADMUS. Everyone made mistakes and damn it if Maggie wasn't this close to sending Alex there herself sometimes.

Lena, who had been standing off to the side bent over the counter, making herself scarce as she watched Alex and Maggie's argument. It was a little but funny but it was concerning because Alex's same attitudes about her own health had trickled down to Kara. Though this woman who had just walked in was frequent in stories the sisters would tell and Lena had been wanting to meet her for a while now. "Lena Luther, nice to meet you." Lena says as she stands from her slouched position and extends a hand.

"Lucy Lane. Glad we could finally meet." Lucy shakes her hand with a twinkle in her eye. She didn't tell Lena that she'd heard a lot about her from a certain blonde alien but everyone in the room certainly could hear it from the body language. Maggie had to stifle a laugh, Alex rolled her eyes, Lean… Lena's cheeks turned read as she was saved from having to respond "only good things I hope." That was always a little awkward. Lucy drops Lena's hand with a nod as she plops down on one of the stools folding her arms over the top of the counter. "Thanks for the call Alex. I appreciate it a lot."

"Yeah no problem. She misses you and maybe you can help her?" Lucy isn't really in a great place herself but then again she hasn't been for a long time. Alex hadn't seen it at first. She just saw a cold JAG who worked with CADMUS of all things. Now though it was just Lucy and Alex hoped that her and Kara could help each other.

"Yeah at least I can try." Lucy kinda shrugged as she picked up on Alex's intentions. The older sister couldn't help it but sometimes Lucy just wanted them to let her be about this kind of stuff. She was doing just fine. At least she was doing better than Kara was. Quickly leaning forward across the island Lucy snags the bag of chips from Alex and pops a couple in her mouth "So do you guys just take turns baby sittin' or…"

"No." Alex protests immediately after lunging for the chips. Lucy tilts her head sideways and arches an eyebrow, somewhere in between the classic Maggie and Lena "bullshit" looks. Alex didn't really want to lie about it anymore though so she drops her head to the counter muttering "Well kinda." Maggie sighs and puts a comforting hand on her fiance's back rubbing small circles as the other two women watch sympathetically. "She's still to concussed to really be left on her own and she has been pretty lonely so …"

"Fair enough" Lucy shrugs as she checks her buzzing phone. Seeing who the message was from she rolls her eyes and switches from her relaxed demeanor and glances leerily in Lena's direction. "I was hoping we could talk businesses, the three of us. We can obviously do that later."

Lena catches on rather quickly. But she isn't offended. Lucy had no idea that she knew all about their clandestine organization. She also had learned enough about Lucy to know it wasn't even remotely about what her last name was. It was also pretty obvious at the way the woman kept glancing in the direction of Kara's room that she was just as worried as the rest of them were. "No, you guys go take care of it. I'll stay with her."

"Lena you don't have to do that. Do you even have time?" Alex was the first to protest. Maggie wanted to elbow her for it. Of course Lena wanted to stay. How did Alex not see that she'd drop almost anything for her little sister?

"Yes. Absolutely. It's fine." And Lena stays as long as she can until Jess calls her into the office because one of the engineers needed a second pair of eyes on a project. She knew Kara wouldn't be alone for too long, that one of the three other women would likely return in a couple of hours and Kara would still probably be asleep when they came back anyway.

Much to Kara's chagrin she is still without her powers, still reeling from her concussion, still in a great deal of pain from her hip. She calls out to see if anyone is hope before pulling her laptop over from the other side of the browse through some netflix suggestions when a soft knock on the side of her wall calls her attention to her friend leaning up against it and watching her carefully. "Hey, heard a certain ray of sunshine's been feeling a little lousy. Should you be on your computer?"

"Lucy! What are you doing here? And I'm bored. Like out of my mind bored." Kara tosses the still open computer off to the side where it bounces a little too close to the edge of the mattress for her comfort. She watches for a second before turning her attention back to her friend.

The wince as Kara tried to prop herself up on her elbows isn't missed by Lucy. She'd been there, well not exactly where Kara is but close enough. "Got a call from an unnamed DEO Agent and got on the next flight over that I could after wrapping up some stuff. I've missed you guys."

"We've missed you too." Kara smiles as Lucy approaches her and takes a seat on the side of the bed. Lucy had always made a habit of making herself at home. Kara found it comforting that she found herself so comfortable to be able to do that. It gave so much familiarity to Kara. Similar to how when Lucy lived in National City and Kara would come home to her friend raiding her fridge or using her Netflix account feet, still in shoes, up on her coffee table. It felt like family.

As if to prove a point Lucy pops a raspberry in her mouth from a cupped hand. A raspberry that Kara knows damn well came from some of those snacks Lena had put in her fridge. "How are you holding up?"

"I'm…" Kara looks down at her legs beneath the covers of her bed to avoid that knowing look Lucy seems to always have on her face. "I'm getting through it."

"It's tough, yeah?" Lucy quirks a sideways little smile at Kara gentle with understanding. The young woman looking up at her from the many pillows propped behind her. The blonde locks pulled back in a loose ponytail and shining in the sunlit room somewhere just this side of greasy.

Lucy contemplates asking Kara if she'd want her help washing her hair or getting around but she didn't want to make Kara uncomfortable. They were close, sure, but there was always a layer of something between them. Maybe it was their mutual feelings for James, though that was no long over. Maybe it was both their need to be stronger for the other. It just wasn't Lucy's role and she was fine with that. Kara had other people there for that kind of thing, and Lucy would gladly fill whatever role Kara needed.

It just so happened to be the blunter - no bullshit - kind of listening ear rather than the soft and gently refuting one.

"Yeah," and for a second Lucy lets Kara pretend she's talking about her injuries only. The other stuff, all of it have been a lot. Lucy knows. Lucy might know better than anyone. She hadn't lost a significant other, and certainly not in the way Kara had but she could gleen what the hero might be feeling.

Lucy takes a moment to take in the hero in front of her. She couldn't see Kara's torso, still, still, littered with cuts and bruises. She couldn't see Kara's hip or the cast on he lower leg. But Kara looked beat. She looked exhausted and her eyes had that far off- glassy- kind of look that only came with concussions. And Kara looked green, pale and just off. Her cheeks didn't have their usual flush, they even looked a little sunken in. Her eyes looked a little black underneath and she couldn't tell if they were just healing shiners or if her friend was just that exhausted. The time for pretending was over. "And the injuries?"

Kara takes as long of a breath as her still broken ribs would allow as she accepts her friend's question - giving into the fact that Lucy had seen right through her and there was really no point of pretending. At least, Kara thought, at least Lucy hadn't pushed the issue of her admitting that she was having a tough time with, well, everything. "They suck. You guys are crazy for doing this stuff and being so breakable."

The associate director lets out a small laugh at the same time Kara attempts a wince-less chuckle without much success. "Well you're not wrong there." Lucy shakes her head slowly with an amused glimmer in her eye. Kara was trying, she'd give her that. "I brought you something." She shrugs off the backpack she was carrying from her perch on the side of the bed allowing it to swing around to her lap..

"Lucy you shouldn't have…" Kara trails off as Lucy digs into the bag and pulls the gift from it. Kara gets the view of a long stick like thing with a claw looking end and damn it if that little puppy head tilt she always did didn't almost make Lucy forget the circumstances of her visit. "What's that?"

"Well, ya see… I've broken my ankle once or twice… a few times... and those casts get pretty itchy. It won't be yet but if it takes your powers a little while to come back it will. Alex told me it probably won't be for a little while, huh?"

"Yeah…" Kara folds her hands in her lap, her thumbs chasing circles around each other for a long moment as she contemplates her situation. "Yeah…" Her powers. They're gonna take a while to come back. All the tests said her solar levels were fine. She was fine. Her body was just fatigued and it was going to need rest and sun and proper nourishment. If Kara had to guess it would be at least a couple more weeks. On the bright side, everyone on the medical team felt confident that this wasn't a - you might lose your powers - situation. Kara wasn't entirely convinced. She hated feeling this vulnerable.

She shakes her head blinking slow and taking another long draw of air into her lungs as she pulls herself from those thoughts. Kara didn't want to get caught there, especially not with an audience. Though when she looked up at Lucy she was just holding out the scratcher and waiting on Kara to get through wherever her mind had jumped to with that kind of understanding that Kara had only really seen in her and Maggie. Kara gives as much of a smile as she can teasing, or attempting to tease, her friend. "Thank you, I think."

"Don't judge." Lucy scoffs, as if affronted, thinking back to her many, too many, times in a cast. The feeling of the compression dressing being peeled back. The pinch of the removal of the stitches that itch so. damn. bad. The dry and cracking skin - pale and sick looking. The atrophied muscle. The leg hair so long the raisor needs rinsed almost after each pass. The way being exposed to air feels weird the first couple of days. Yeah… Lucy certainly didn't miss that. She has to fight a shiver twisting up her spine at just the thought. "Scratching your shin for the first time in three months is an orgasmic experience. Trust me."

And Lucy remembers that too. Sneaking whatever she could reach down her cast to give just some relief. Sometimes once she started she couldn't stop. When she was a kid Lois would tattle on her for it or try to scare her that if she kept scratching they'd have to cut it off. Lucy, being 8, believed her and stopped immediately. But damn, when she broke it during one of her summer's at West Point, Cadet Field Training, and the stupid-fucking-army took three surgeries to fix it? You bet your ass she tried scratching it again. Being in that boot from June-December was her own personal hell.

"Hopefully I won't be experiencing that... " Kara's cheeks grow red and she thinks that Alex was right to keep checking her for a fever because suddenly her face felt very hot.

Orgasm is such a weird word…. An even weirder word to think about. Lucy knew Kara's tendency to get flustered and uncomfortable at the mention of anything sexual or suggestive and to be frank, she loved it. She thought that shit was the funniest damn thing. Lucy language.

But feeling the need to give Kara a little mercy given her current state Lucy doesn't pursue one of her favorite pastimes - teasing Kara. She only takes the scratcher back from Kara and places it on the nightstand, noticing the flinch and quick suck of breath from the woman beside her at the movement on the bed. "Yeah you and those damn Kryptonian jeans… lucky bitch."

"Shut up." Kara smiles. Actually smiles. Kara had always appreciated Lucy's crassness when she was feeling particularly tired. It seemed to bring out the years growing up around the army and it's men (and women, but mostly men).

"For the record though, I hope you don't experience it either, as amazing as it is." An awkward silence falls on the two friends as Lucy sits there taking a second to pat Kara's thigh and immediately regretting it when Kara sucks a quick breath of air in and pushes her hands into the bed as if to brace herself. "Sorry," she mutters before letting the silence fall over them again not quite sure what to say to her dear friend. You could only really joke so much about stuff like this before it felt too real.

She takes a deep breath before pulling the back back up into her lap and again. After a couple of seconds of rummaging around Lucy extends out a metal cuff to Kara. "I, um, I got you something else." Kara takes it from her hands holding the bracelet close to her face, rolling it around in her fingers as she examines it. It's cool to the touch but Kara can feel little ridges on the "face" of it indicating an inscription of some sort. "I know…"

"Lucy." Kara cuts her off as she runs her hand over the inscription on the metal band again taking in the etched words. DEO crest on one end, her family glif on the other, words _Mon-El Prince of Daxam, MIA 3 JUN 2017 - Daxamite Invasion of National City_.

"It's a memorial bracelet. It's a thing we do in the military to, um, remind us who they were and help give us something to serve for. I know… I know Mon-El's not dead but-"

"We don't know that."

"No, we don't. But I have to believe that he's out there somewhere, even if that's not here. Anyway… I thought you might like this. Mon-El is a hero too and this is how we sometimes remember them." Lucy pauses again now acting more self-conscious than Kara had ever seen her. "You don't have to wear it or anything. I know you don't wear a lot of jewelry but…" She notices a tear in Kara's eye. "I'm sorry. It was stupid. I shouldn't have, I don't know what I was thinking. It's not the same… I'm sorry."

"No, no Lucy. Thank you. This… it means a lot." Lucy reaches up to tuck a piece of hair behind her own ear that really hadn't fallen out, just wanting something to do with her hands. As her sleeve pulls down her forearm from where her elbow bends Kara notices her own metal cuff, though it's black some silver glints through. She'd never noticed it before. Which was strange really because Kara thought she was pretty observant. "Who were they?"

"What?"

"Who's on yours?" Kara motions with the back of her hand toward her friend's wrist now dropping back down to rest in her lap.

"Oh," she takes the bracelet off and hands it to Kara. It reads _1st Lt. Ashlyn "Buckets" Jackson, KIA 5 APR 2011 - Operation Enduring Freedom_. Kara notes how originally it was black, sort of matted, but the edges and some in the center along the turns of the cuff have turned to silver as the coating had been rubbed away. Kara imagines Lucy had probably been wearing it for years now. It was scratched up but still somehow smooth, almost soft feeling, and warm compared to Kara's. "My roommate from West Point. Helicopter Accident. AJ was the best person I know. Knew. You remind me a lot of her actually. You guys would have got along great." Lucy gives a smile, a little sad for a second but now just found in remembrance. "She was the first one we lost in my class but she was the best of us so I try to honor that."

"You do, Lucy. I'm sure she's very proud of you. You're amazing. Thank you." She hands the bracelet to Lucy who twists it on with practiced ease. Her hand lingering to play with the warn metal band. Kara finds her own gaze moving to the metal bangle in her hands as she runs the pad of her thumb over the letters. "Thank you, I … uh, it's been tough ya know?" Lucy nods because, yeah, she kind of does. She'd lost a good number of her friends but never like that… "Mon-El, he wasn't like that. He… he was getting there, he had a lot to overcome. He had overcome a lot. A lot of stuff he grew up around wasn't really ok. His planet, they kept slaves and were pretty messed up in a lot of ways but he.. He was trying to make it right. He had changed. I hope he is, making things right, wherever he went… god I hope he made it somewhere."

Lucy just smiles softly taking a moment to look up from the cuff she was still twisting around her wrist and encourage her friend to keep talking. Kara's eyes had grown watery but who could really blame her. What she had to do… it was hell. "He believed in me so much… he called me out… but he really believed in me. He knew I'm not perfect or even all that great myself and he believed in me anyway. I don't want to prove him wrong, you know? God, Lucy the way he looked at me… it was like… I can't even describe it. It made me feel so loved, so seen."

Those big blue eyes find Lucy's again as Kara takes a deep breath. She hadn't even really thought about this part of him. She blames the drugs for letting this slip out… "People, they've worshiped me like a god and even they didn't look at me like that. And he knew me. Knew how broken and messed up and judgmental and wrong I could be and he looked at me like that anyway. I want to be the hero he thought I was, a person who deserves to have been looked at like that."

She takes a deep breath. Kara knows that largely she was a good person, at least she'd like to think that. She, however, was so aware of her flaws, her deficiencies, and sometimes she wasn't. Mon-El had seemed to bring just about all of them. He had been on the receiving end of her prejudice, her judgment, her self-righteousness. She thought she was so much better than him, this wasn't Kara trying to erase his flaws or where he was wrong, but usually, the second he realized that what was common on Daxam wasn't right he fixed it. Most things he did at least. Others were harder to overcome the years of conditioning but still… he was trying. He was trying really hard. "I haven't been recently…"

"Listen, I think you've been absolutely the best hero you can be right now. My mom always told me to be the best I can be on any given day because some days you have a little more than others. You're giving it everything you have, no one can ask any more of you. You're running yourself ragged with the whole hero thing." The woman motions to her nonchalantly. "Clearly. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're grieving. You're in pain. You're doing a lot better than pretty much everyone would given the situation, but you're losing yourself. That's what you haven't been recently."

Kara's jaw drops a little bit in shock. Lucy hadn't been around for almost 8 months now. Maybe longer than that. She hadn't been here to witness Kara's reaction to what had happened. "Don't look at me like that. I watch the news." To Lucy, heck to anyone who knew her, Kara looked so damn miserable all the time. She tried to fake the smile but body language is a thing. "Also I've talked to Alex and James and Winn, ok?"

"Traitors." She lets out an indignant puff of air as her hands find the resting spot in her lap where they continue to hold the new bracelet.

"Shut up. How do you think he'd feel if he knew you were pushing away what makes you, you." Kara turns her head to the opposite side of the room for a moment because she knew Mon-El would be devastated. She just knew it so she tried not to think about it. But instead of just telling Lucy that she started to protest. Only her friend had cut her off before she could even get two words out. "Seriously, Kara, I notice stuff for a living. You're not fooling anyone."

This time instead of patting her thigh Lucy lets her hand rest on Kara's forearm and give it a little squeeze as the silence falls over them again. "Have you ever made a decision knowing it would kill someone?" Kara wasn't talking about killing someone herself, Lucy knew that much. Lucy had done that. Because despite being a JAG she actually knew her way around a weapon… She knew her way around a fight too thanks to her father's absentee parenting style and proclivity for leaving her around whatever base he just so happened to be stationed at, but that's not what Kara was asking about.

"I know I was in the army Kara, but I was a JAG. A lawyer, not a war fighter. It's kind of like not being in the real army. We don't see combat, we don't even deploy really." She thought to all her colleagues who hadn't done something in the military first before becoming a JAG. She had. She had been deployed and the whole lot before she lat-transferred. But the others...they were a little clueless. Their uniforms were just off and sometimes she'd catch some idiot still wearing their cover indoors. It drover her more than a little crazy.

"Lucy." If you're not going to let me avoid my stuff, you don't get to pretend that you're 100% ok with your experience in war either.

"Fine. I have. Well not directly I guess but I've been in the process plenty. I've ok'd operations and strikes as legal, and even found loopholes in order to give the go-ahead for some. Hell I've said no to things that could have probably saved some lives because legally, we couldn't do it. There were no loopholes. It sucks."

Kara looks at the woman before her. She takes in the air of nonchalance about Lucy as she says those things. It's incredible really because the words themselves seem like it would be enough to be haunting but here Lucy was being, well, Lucy. "How… how do you deal with that?"

Kara watches as that stupid little act of indifference disappears as Lucy rubs her hand over the back of her neck. "I… I uh.. I haven't quite figured that one out yet. If I do, you'll be the first to know."


End file.
